Agile_Chapter2452


























  1. It’s pretty to think so but like, even if this is true, they’re still absent from my life and I’m living without anyone who feels this way about me (even remotely so)….sorry but I hate false hope shit like this

  2. My friends organized Halloween without me.🙂👍💔

  3. Ugh…I feel your pain…my friends all went out and did a bunch of fun Halloween stuff without me too 😭🫠

  4. Have you thought about getting a dog? It's not a replacement for human interaction but it helped me when my house was empty all the time

  5. Oh man do I feel you on this! It’s so easy for other people to tell you to just ‘stay strong and carry on’ or whatever bullshit variation…but I agree with you, I’ve tried to ‘keep pushing forward’ and always find myself back at the bottom, dying internally. Literally why try when I end up right back at the grim beginning every time?

  6. Exactly where I'm at right now. It seems like the longer I try to hold on the worse it all gets.

  7. Exactly…I’ve had enough I can’t just sit out decades of this shit while my mental health deteriorates

  8. Very relatable and I’m in a very similar situation…it can be so torturous to think back on better times when there was love and friendship and possibility…the thought of enduring decades of this debilitating loneliness is horrifying and I can’t fkn handle it…sorry I’m not offering solutions, just commiserating ✌🏻✌🏻

  9. I have Schizoid tendencies. I have some odd behaviors, but I'm not sure if it would be considered SzPD tendencies. You have strange, paranoid thinking?

  10. It’s so comforting to read things like “the ways in which these overlapping personality disorders can be treated isn’t fully known” 🫠

  11. Yeah, unfortunately…the paranoia stems from a traumatic experience years ago but has been exacerbated by social isolation for over a year now

  12. I just came across this disorder while randomly deep diving online about my borderline personality disorder and bipolar diagnosis, only to find that I may have been schizotypal my whole life instead 🙃 I am described by everyone I’ve known as ‘weird’ or ‘eccentric’ I have weird face body and speech patterns that I cannot fully control and it makes me very off putting to people, it always has I have failed to fit in with any groups of people anywhere throughout my whole life, with the exceptions/blessings of kind extroverts who took me under their wing for a time and showed me the world. But even in those times I always felt like an alien amongst the humans I have a certainty in my beliefs about creation, God, what happens when we die, etc that is a strange combo of ideas I think that certain songs come on exactly when I need to hear them and that is a message from the universe or something that I need to pay attention to.

  13. Damn this is awesome! Although I feel like this kind of methodology isn’t really taught to therapists these days, such a shame, they may actually be able to help us 🫠🫠

  14. The author is absolutely great! He often tells you about his most inner thoughts, admitting his faults and mistakes and his experiences with PWBPD. It's absolutely all new to me too and I can't recommend enough this book

  15. It’s like watching “Throne Wives of the Seven Kingdoms”. They walk around the whole time talking sh*t about one-another and nothing ever happens.

  16. Lmaooo best response so far 😂😂😂 And you couldn’t be more correct

  17. Nah yea, this show is kinda slow and boring. The only real conflicts so far are: you must get married, I must have a boy heir, and my brother is kind of a dick huh guys?

  18. How old are y’all? I’m in my mid 30s and it’s been like this since I was around 29. I feel like I’ve just hit a new level of awareness day about it.

  19. I feel you dude, I’m also in my own little private hell; going to work everyday and barely talking to anyone, pacing around my apartment thinking the same thoughts over and over…it’s agonizing and I’m starting to lose touch with reality…I don’t see any way out of this either, I’ve tried putting myself out there and I’ve failed…idk I’m considering the big exit I can’t take this shit anymore, certainly not for endless decades that’ll roll out in front of me

  20. I can relate so much. I used to play sports and was very social. Fast forward a few yrs. Ive quit sport and i live by myself no gf or anything. The other day i had to buy parts for my car and as i tried to talk i stuttered my first few words. Ive never done that. My social skills has gone down so much

  21. Yeah the erosion of the social abilities sucks…like I hear myself either struggle to form a sentence or end one when having a ‘conversation’ or even just a brief interaction with a person…idk how I’ll ever be able to make new friends or find another partner

  22. American Doll Posse was the first one I really got into…then I figured out she had 15 years worth of music up to that point so I circled back to Little Earthquakes and worked my way through 😄🤙🏻

  23. ESPECIALLY IF THEY ARE UNTREATED OR NOT SEEKING TREATMENT!! LIVING HELL!!

  24. Yes! That makes it even harder…I’m on a whole cocktail of meds and get ‘therapy’ and stuff but my one friend who’s also borderline takes the ‘spiritual’ approach to recovery, so it’s very hard to actually have a cohesive conversation with her…love her to death but still 😓

  25. It's terrible, I wish I could just let go on those things

  26. Same…and no amount of YouTube videos on Buddhism and Forgiveness and letting go seem to help 😅🙃

  27. This is all any of them really do now in a way. It’s all self help workbooks and nonsense. Mine lately is always on the “accept your limitations” train. It’s like she doesn’t want me to do any better.

  28. Yes exactly! It’s so infuriating…they literally don’t listen to what you say and just roll off different exercises from the DBT workbook…no shade to people who use that and it works for them but worksheets and bullshit like that just makes me feel worse. I think every therapist and counselor should be required to read The Bell Jar and Catcher in the Rye so they can understand that actual subjective experience of dealing with a mental illness. And I also get the frustration with the ‘go put yourself out there and make some friends 😃’ approach, as if that’s something that anyone with a SPMI can just go out and do 😓😓 There’s so much that is still unknown about mental illness, but I think the therapy focus should be on listening to the individuals experience and trying to understand and help them work from within, instead of worksheets or blank stares followed by generic responses

  29. Sending virtual hugs and condolences…I’m right there with you in the same boat…I relate to so much of this…it’s so easy for people to say, ‘just go out and make some friends! 😃’ as if it’s just that easy for everyone…I’ve put myself out there and made an effort and still failed to make anything stick…my adhd/BPD combo makes me really off putting to people so it fucks everything up..

  30. We’re all helplessly hoping for someone or something to show us the way out of the pit that we’re in…I post stuff sometimes that gets no response whatsoever, but at least I’ve vented it out into the world…I’m grateful for a safe space like this to express and relate on the struggle with this fucking curse we’ve all got

  31. Talk to your boss and let them know you’re having health issues and need to step away for a while. Truthfulness (within reason) may enable you to return when you’re feeling good again.

  32. She’s definitely got some spiritual connections in some way…when I saw her in concert earlier this year it was wild how all of the songs and the order in which she played them was exactly what i needed to hear..and others at that show said the exact same thing..like how does she craft a setlist that at once appeals to all and also connects with all? She’s something else 🙌🙌

  33. I’ve always loved how she says the lines “my dark twin the annihilating feminine does not need civilizing” however that it one of the only lyrics I’ve heard right when I looked up the lyrics just now lol! For one I thought it was “maybe he terrifies me/his quiet agency” also thought it was “it’s too easy to wish you home” so I guess it makes more sense now why this song, although it’s a favorite, has eluded me in meaning.

  34. Yeah I have the same experience with a lot of her songs she sings in a way that the words can get augmented so I pretty much always look up the lyrics so I can catch the full vibe 😄

  35. Ooh it’s gives me chills to read it again…I’m so glad to hear that you’re enjoying it!

  36. Thank you 🥹 it does totally suck…but yeah I don’t want him to know how badly I’ve been doing so it’s just best to avoid any situation where I may see him..seeing him again literally puts me right back where I was mentally when he left 🫠

  37. Do you still have feelings? Are you okay with hearing out/ex taking about/having new sig other there?

  38. Not too proud, no. And I ended up not going, I couldn’t stand to see him out having fun while I’m fkn dying still 🫠

  39. I’m down! Maybe all of our emotions will sync up into perfect harmony lol

  40. Either text a friend for an ‘emergency’ call or just straight up fake getting a phone call that for whatever imaginary reasons makes you have to leave immediately…this technique requires a bit of improv ability but can’t be argued with by the other person

  41. I relate to all of this, beginning to end…I feel your pain my friend 🙏✌🏻💗

  42. Hell yes to the rejection sensitivity…and the sensitivity to humiliation in movies or tv might be linked to trauma from being a child with adhd who would be consistently ostracized and punished…a psych explained that to me once years ago and I was like 🤯

  43. You deserve to live a life worth living. You have been through hell. You can get through this too! I believe in you. You are enough!

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