1. It's called the Globus Sensation. Quickly googled and it seems to be a result of muscle strain. Basically muscles in your neck expand the throat when you cry. Then when you swallow while crying, you're working against those same muscles, causing them to strain. It results in a painful lumpy feeling. Might not totally be accurate because it was a quick search, but multiple sources are saying the same thing. It's completely normal it seems.

  2. for real this shit is getting out of hand. i’m 28 and my generation started convincing everyone they have adhd and autism and everything else in the book 10 years ago and it’s just flown off the handle since.

  3. Humans stop crying when the cause of it doesn't get fixed. You become emotional numb without realizing it. It is way of self defense of the brain.

  4. I just can't cry in front of others, the emotions are all there but I freeze up and just kind of wait until I'm alone to... also not feel them and just nap until I wake up and have successfully repressed my anger/anxiety/sadness.

  5. Same, well...kind of, I can cry but something needs to push me over the edge REALLY hard in order for me to cry.

  6. This comment and its replies make me feel so seen. I haven't cried since 2012. I've come close a few times, but it catches in my throat and the moment passes. It's good to know I have dry eyed company.

  7. I lost the ability to cry after certain childhood events, and even after family member deaths and very gut wrenching moments, I was sad, but never a single tear.

  8. Depends on the circumstances at least. Thought I was at an “I don’t cry” point in my early/mid twenties. Lost my dog a few weeks ago. Turns out, I’m quite capable of crying.

  9. Same! I have no insecurities about crying in front of people because emotions are universal and part of what make us human, but I hate crying because it truly chokes me up. I can breathe fine, but talking while crying is so hard for me.

  10. And it's incredibly annoying during arguments cause you can't get your point across. Add in the hiccups and I might as well just lose it already

  11. And I sound like that when under pressure lol, like when I put up my hand in class and say a controversial opinion lol

  12. I try really hard not to cry. I cry when I’m angry or frustrated, and it’s hard to be taken serious in my line of work when I get that way. Usually I just have to walk away from a situation, go be myself and have a good cry then come back to it. Other times I just flip my welding hood down and have a good cry under there.

  13. Facts, I was beaten so I had to cry in the end anyways due to pain or being scared - so I cry even faster in normal situations now bc it’s a response bc my body remembers pain when I express myself and someone is mad at me.

  14. I’m confused. I get the pain in my throat when I’m especially upset and that usually includes crying. But maybe it’s leading up to crying and crying is the release? I need to pay closer attention the next time I’m devastated enough to cry that hard.

  15. Yep! I’m not a very confrontational person, and whenever I’m especially upset due to how strongly emotional I can get at times, I’m unable to fully express myself.

  16. As a widower who had just started getting back into the dating pool, The woman I was dating (now my wife) was shocked at the way I handled my kids being angry or frustrated with me. They would essentially talk back or scream their frustration and storm off. A few minutes later everyone would have calmed down and it was back to "love you, Dad." "I love you too, sweetie." She grew up in a house where you weren't allowed to show any anger of frustration back to them. As a result she dealt with anger by letting something unrelated push her over the edge. Cue me saying something like "okay I know you're not really this upset that I left silverware in the sink."

  17. That sounds nice...even if I calmly and politely try to explain myself to my father or defend myself he just yells at me even more. And it escalates. I don't even know how many times I've been called a retard or miserable fuck or ungrateful whatever from him for completely unrelated reasons. Sighs.

  18. Yeah, we were not allowed to express any 'negative' emotions. We were allowed to be happy, but anger, sadness, frustration, etc. was NOT allowed. As an adult, I suck at handling conflict and am constantly trying to make everything 'smooth'.

  19. There are other ways to handle anger and frustration than just talking back or screaming though and that’s not because of one being a father and others being their children. Dealing with difference and confrontation can come in other forms. There may be room for change I feel like if they can’t voice their disagreement in a different manner.

  20. Yeah this is so stupid she’s acting like your throat hurts because you’re getting PTSD and feel like you’re not allowed to or some bullshit… it’s not like that’s just what happens when you cry and get emotional or anything lol

  21. My mom would hit me and I would cry and she'd hit me again to make me stop crying???? And id legit hold my hand to my mouth to hold in the sobs 😃😃

  22. Bro and then some parents hit their children harder if they DONT cry. My grandma always talks about how her mother was whooping her and she would say “oh you not gonna cry huh?”, and hit her until she cried. She ended up doing the same to me once. And the thing is (especially in the black community), people LAUGH and celebrate stories of them getting hit to shreds, like in “I Wish” by Stevie Wonder. I truly don’t get how people feel abuse is treasured and celebratory. Disgusting.

  23. Dude this reminds me of when my mom left town for a week and made my dad help me clean my room, he was SO fucking pissed about it and drunk, he already had a history of hitting me when mad, so whenever he made a sudden movement in my direction, I would flinch

  24. My dad denied me things if I cried. First no dessert, then no TV, then no leaving the room. Once it got as far as no dinner.

  25. My mom would hit me and then tell me not to cry or she'd give me something to cry about. Cuz apparently being hit in the face by your caretaker isn't cry-worthy

  26. I’ve gotten so good at repressing crying sounds that I can be sobbing next to my bf and he won’t notice unless he sees the tears on my face :(

  27. My parents where fine with me crying but I got bullied in school and if I cried I would get bullied even harder so it’s kinda hardwired into me to not cry. I wish I could cry tho

  28. Yeah, i'll teach my boy to be mentally strong 'cause kids are cruel and they will bully you for crying. It happened to me too. Men must be strong.

  29. No emotions allowed. Even when depressed and nearly want to cry, can't. Raised to not show weakness. It's pretty freaking debilitating. No clue where the idea that boys and men are not allowed to have emotions came from. But it needs to end. We are human.

  30. Anger’s acceptable though! Angry men always get a pass. “Oh don’t mind him he’s just a hothead” as he assaults people from time to time. Yayyyyyy

  31. I remember reading that it had something to do with the industrial revolution. Since men were now working with machines and to the rhythm of machines, they were expected to function like machines themselves. The women were supposed to stay at home so they weren't affected by this (but don't you dare show emotions as a women in the modern workplace...).

  32. I wish I was allowed so I didn’t become such a closed up person. Now whenever I struggle with emotions they become a real bothersome because I was not taught how to deal with it

  33. Or it's just describing a specific feeling lots of people have for various reasons. Like...jeez, people are just sharing their thoughts and feelings, you shouldn't be mean to people who are just being open and vulnerable.

  34. For real. I’m supportive of my kids’ emotional well-being but they also need to learn not to wail like banshees when they can’t have a second serving of ice cream.

  35. My body soft resets if I’m about to cry, I haven’t gotten that throat feeling in over a decade. I just physically am unable to cry

  36. I was never allowed to show emotions. Crying was almost a sin in my house. It took me way to long in my adult life, with the help of some therapy, to come to the conclusion that I just needed a good cry.

  37. Bro it IS normal. That’s the thing! Your throat closes up when you want to cry and are experiencing heavy emotions. Ever heard of “a lump in your throat?” That’s the common phrase for that pain in the back of your throat when you want to cry. This post is just as silly as if it were phrased “were you allowed to express emotions as a child or do you eat when you’re hungry?” Don’t let yourself get “gaslit” into thinking you have trauma

  38. God damn it, we've come full circle. You know what? Sometimes it's ok not to cry. Sometimes you just don't want to, or it's not the time or place. Some people just aren't criers, or need to be in safe space to do it.

  39. Thank you. There are some situations where it is not appropriate to cry. Some people don't cry. I'm glad we're moving to a more emotionally accepting era, but can we please not encourage people to just cry everywhere all the time?

  40. About 7 months ago I cut things off my with my dad after my own kid (6) told me he was disciplined by his grandfather. When questioning my dad about it he couldn’t remember why. I was beat heavily as a kid and was always told to stop crying and “take it like a man”. One of the best things I have done as a father.

  41. I wasn’t able to properly express emotions and now if there’s a mild inconvenience or someone slightly raises their voice around me I cry. I also get angry and instead of expressing anger I just cry so really it’s an all around disaster

  42. It would get so bad for me my throat would practically close up on me. To the point where I could barely breath and definitely couldn't talk.

  43. I was “taught” to suppress them, then the b!tch had the nerve to say I never showed emotions (why the f*ck would I show emotions when I got beaten/mocked for them). I left said egg-donor the minute I turned 18.

  44. Throat agony during emotion has nothing to do with childhood emotional crippling. It's just a dual motion leading to momentary pain in the throat.

  45. "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about" is what they said, which led me to trying to stop but it just makes it worse and led to me hyperventilating

  46. I grew up with parents who would get furious us if we got hurt, not because they loved us but because it was going to cost them money (of which they had plenty of) so much so that we would hide our injuries just to not get yelled at.

  47. does anyone else get a stomachache as a response to any feeling? no matter if it's sadness or joy or whatever. bam, stomach hurts and it feels like I'm gonna throw up

  48. Sometimes I'll be reading/watching someone's social media and they'll say something like 'so I just cried all afternoon'. I'm not an unemotional person but I can only imagine doing that if I was grieving or like had my life turned upsidedown by something. Maybe I'm not expressing my emotions enough?

  49. I'm so sorry to see this. I'm a dude who came from an emotionally expressive household, so it's not a problem for me. But I have known many who come from emotionally repressive homes and it's sad to hear this is so common.

  50. The worst was when you were at the table trying to eat and something was said that made you want to cry. God, that lump in your throat that made it impossible to eat everything on your plate so you could leave the table. And yes, I am fat as an adult.

  51. The pain. My mom used to whoop me and then she would yell at me to stop crying or she would give me something to cry about. My dad yells at me and tells me to stop being ridiculous and stop crying. He also asks me if I am on my period if I cry around him.

  52. Expressing your emotions against your parents as a child could be considered disrespectful... Guess where Im from.

  53. Not me. But my SO. I thought he is heartless. Bad stuff happens to me or kids. His face goes stoic and he is like "could you go away I dont care". Once he told that he cant cry. He gets lump in his throat. In three years i have his eyes getting teary two times. He is better man than his father. Never raises his hand or voice to his kids. But when he gets anxious like when i am upset for a reason when normal person would express emotion or cry he just pushes everyone away. Gets days without contact. I thought he was being an ass. But looks like this is something what happens when bad stuff happens in childhood.

  54. I used to think that's what it meant to get my feelings hurt. When I'd want to cry but not want to cry, usually because a family member said something shitty to 10 year old me.

  55. Look, I'm a grown ass man fully capable of venting my frustrations and talking about my emotions but I still get this feeling in my throat.

  56. The most abuse I’ve ever received and was also the most inappropriate place to get emotional and you would be treated even worse if they saw your emotions was working as a waitress in a restaurant. What’s even more sick is these people took pleasure in making us cry and feel bad about ourselves. They would literally do anything to hurt you and laugh at you and make you want to die when all you’re trying to do is put food on the table. You’re just trying to work. This has happened in almost every restaurant I’ve worked in. I was furloughed in 2020 and I will never go back despite how great the money is.

  57. Everytime I cried I was asked why are you crying there's nothing to cry about. If I was upset, why are you upset there's nothing to be upset about I eventually, as a 6 year old, was pulling my toe nails off. Just sit there and pick at them until I tore the whole thing off. But there was nothing to be upset about.

  58. Learning to let go and cry has been one of the best things ever. Just feels good to let go. Now I’m a huge baby and cry for everything from sad to happy

  59. My father was a war child. Him and his brother left school at the age of 11 to fight the war. When his brother was 17 and he was 16, his brother died in the war and was declared a hero. 17 years later I was born and he named me after his brother. That is the first story I was ever told, the significance of my name. My father disciplined me as though I was in the army. When I would fall down and cry he would lift me from my shirt and screamed in my face to stop crying, that I’m not allowed to cry, that I’m a soldier. He would kick me out of bed as a child to go and work with him. Nothing was ever good enough, nothing I was able to do can measure up to his standards.

  60. I know so many people that have awesome relationships with their parents and never had to deal with this, I start to feel alone and even a bit jealous. Seeing all these people and comments definitely make me feel not alone.

  61. No, but my tears still fell. Because I have narcissist parents. They would tell me to stop crying or stop being a poopyhead. Even though they are reason for my panic attack and anxiety attack. They both cause me a lot of trauma in my childhood which probably won't heal until their dead.

  62. Yes. Still have memories as a child where I was told to stop crying or I would be given something to cry about. As a result when I was a teenager I would try my damnest to never cry in front of anyone. I developed BPD as a result of that and a mix of other things.

  63. I heard that phrase all too often. My dad was also the type where if one child did something wrong we all got punished. Since my dad was a drug addict (didnt know that as a child) the punishment could be anything but was usually physical. I had 4 brothers, so there was always shenanigans. My oldest brother came up with the bright idea to 'prank' my dad with the water bucket on the door thing, I remember crying at him to please don't dad will be mad.

  64. Or the involuntary flinch as if someone, somewhere can be heard saying "quit crying, or I'll give you something to cry about."

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