I wish that every time someone orgasms the nearest 5 people orgasm.

  1. Granted. The world becomes just a giant wave of people having orgasams coming and going every few minutes. Nothing gets done and society collapses leading to the eventual extinction of the human race.

  2. Omg imagine how amazing the wave at football games would be! Shit imagine how crazy sports would be in general if it just took one person to start something on the field.

  3. Wouldn't even be minutes, the request didn't specify no backsies. Which might actually save us, if you isolate 6 people, they will keep it contained. Now once 1 dies, we are done for

  4. Granted! The finger curls. Everyone is having nonstop orgasms all the time, this includes animals. Your body is not designed for this, eventually people drop dead. The children and infants are the first to die.

  5. Not if you can get far enough away so you’re not anyones closest person. Funnily (?) if you then have a wank you’d make other people orgasm as five people will be the ones closest to you even if you’re not the one closest to them.

  6. Granted. A lot of religious parents punish their children every time an orgasm wave happens, because they refuse to believe it’s caused by other people and not their children committing the “sin” of masturbation. Chastity cages for children become popular in religious circles for the same reason.

  7. Granted. Now you can’t have a wank without your family or flatmates knowing. And you ALWAYS know when one of them are having one. Eventually orgasms becomes a repulsive thing of public shame. Society regresses. The extreme left classify involuntary orgasms as sexual assault and the extreme religious groups go after the cause with fury. People live in constant fear of being caught out. No one is having s*x anymore. But at least the population is starting to get back under control

  8. I reckon it would go the other way. If everyone had orgasms multiple times a day then it would just become the norm. It’d become a minor annoyance because in big cities you’d rarely be the closest. Only when you were at home and then it could be anyone in your household.

  9. Granted the world falls into chaos and while you're running away you take your parents and grandparents (or whoever is close family) to the middle of nowhere as everyone is fucked. Triggering orgasms to each other as even an orgasm triggered by others, trigger even more.

  10. Granted. The next time someone nuts the closest 5 people follow suit. And the closest 5 to those people as well, and so forth.

  11. Do those other five people also count as an originator, or do we have Dispatcher logic but for orgasms instead of murder?

  12. Granted, after a few hours or days, every living organism in the omniverse is severily dehydrated and their refractory organs run out of bodily fluids to shoot out so the body is shooting blanks, being unable to quit attempts at orgasms because there's still someone else alive in the omniverse. The body is then spending all remaining energy on convulsing euphoria, even when trying to replenish their energies with food and beverages, until the body runs out of energy and dies. The orgasming stops once there is only one life left in the entire omniverse and unless it's a microbial organism with the ability to reproduce asexually, it is now stuck being unable to reproduce until death, dooming all life to extinction.

  13. Not necessarily a Monkey’s Paw-esque downside, but this would probably be used in high security areas- have a ring of people constantly jacking off, with 5 dedicated people by them. If only 4 of them orgasm, there’s an intruder, and said intruder should be easier to catch by force-orgasming them

  14. This is the easiest monkey paw I’ve seen. Even without using a technicality or coming up with a side effect, this just ends poorly. Once one person cums, nobody will stop cumming.

  15. granted. because of a chain reaction, every time one person orgasms, immediately after the nearest 5 to them do, and then the nearest 5 to those 5 do, and so on and so forth until across the entire globe a la mass waves everyone has orgasmed; but this itself causes a feedback loop, as eventually it will wrap back around to where it started — you — and the wave continues. the planet is caught in an endless loop of orgasming within seconds.

  16. Granted! Because you never specified that the reactionary orgasms don’t trigger their own, the world is in a constant state of cum, as everyone passes it on like a nuclear fission reaction. Society collapses and most people starve to death or die due to accidents

  17. People are saying “what about the kids” which is obviously fucked, but it’s also yikes if your parents are in the house lmao

  18. Purposefully vague. Within 1 mile. Or literally the nearest person. So if you jack off on the moon the 5 people on an earth sattelite would splooge.

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