This happened to my dad around 30 years ago. We lived in rural Northern Ireland and there was a very decrepit old hermit type fella who lived in a shack out in the hills. You'd see him occasionally out picking berries and whatnot. He'd always make himself scarce once you spotted him. My dad was one of the few people who knew him, as their dads had known each other.
Omg this is terrifying. My fiance just got diagnosed with diverticulitis at 29.... I'm so glad his wasn't at this stage. I'm sorry you had to go through all that!
I saw some poor chap do just that, but on the hinge of a windsurf, he basically scooped his gashed scrotum into his hands like a ww2 soldier holds his guts. It was gruesome
I tripped while carrying a knife last Saturday. Ended up cutting my arm open to the subcutaneous fat layer. Needed 10 stitches. (I have pictures of the stitches, not the original wound)
Ooh, my cousin has something like this happen. He broke his ankle in a basketball game, had to get crunches and a cast. Two days later, in the bathroom he slips and falls onto one of the large glass candles. He fell on top of it and it impaled his arm.
This reminds me of a time I was washing dishes as a kid and we store our dishes in the washer cuz Asian. Well, I’ll never forget bending down to set a pot in the machine and I let a knife jab me right in the forehead. Would’ve been a really stupid way to die lol
Had a back surgery in 2018…7 months later I started my dream job. 4 months in I get into a work accident and my newly fixed back gets fucked over… I get let go during Covid and during my workers comp case. 2 years later I’m finally better and land a great job and my back is feeling better after therapy. I’m driving to my last workers comp appointment and an asshole t-bones me at an intersection. My car that I finally paid off is completely demolished. I get taken to hospital in a neck brace and stretcher and find out my hip is fucked, back is even more messed up and because the car was spinning wildly - my head was constantly banging against the frame of the door and window, I now have a TBI. Couldn’t work because of all my pain and my brain injury so they rescind my offer for a job. I’m now broke, having to pay for a new car and I’m constantly hurting and memory loss is a new norm.
One of my elders are dealing with similar back and head problems, hearing him talk about it is fucking horrifying. I know words don’t really help but I hope you get better.
I think I’m all out of suffer contributions (for now) after this one. I got into a fight when I was 16. One of the guys smashed a bottle (old school glass lucozade bottle) and swung at me with the nozzle. I was lucky enough to block it, but it basically gouged a chunk out of my left forearm (nerves and tendons severed. If you can imagine a downward swipe of a broken bottle’s nozzle, gouging a hole in the front of your arm). Skip forward an hour or so to the accident and emergency department of St George’s hospital in Tooting, and a nurse soaking a swab of cotton in a dish of pure iodine, looking me in the eye and saying sorry, before sticking the whole swab in what was basically a gaping flap wound hole in my arm (and twisting it around a little). Certainly woke me up! Still makes me feel weird just typing this out now, and that was a good 29 year ago.
My dad got his guts blew out with a 30-06 round rifle. This happened when I was little and I remember seeing the pictures my mom got from the hospital. Jesus fucking Christ idk how he’s still alive but he is
one time i was super hungry and it was like 2am so i went to the fridge and poured a bowl of cereal and ate it in fairly dark conditions. i ended up turning the light on for whatever reason and the bowl of cereal was fucking crawling with ants. i had been eating a bowl of cereal with fucking ants crawling around in it and i didn’t even fucking realize. and i downed almost the whole bowl. i just went back to bed and never thought about it again until i saw this post, so thank you so much.
At my old apartment every time a bag of cereal was opened and put into the pantry, it’d be infested with ants the next day and I’d have to throw it out lol.
I had a slightly similar thing. When I was really young, probably about 4yo I was being babysat by my 14yo uncle. He made me cereal with milk and it smelt bad. He insisted it was fine and that I eat it. I tried to eat it but it tasted awful and I started crying, asking to stop. My uncle got annoyed at me and yelled that he would tell my parents and grandparents how bad I was behaving if I didn't stop complaining. I knew if that happened I'd get punished multiple times by multiple people and my nan would especially drag out the punishment. So I just did my best to eat it. I started to find actual chunks of milk by now but I was too afraid to say anything because I was a dumb kid. I ate about half the cereal before I physically couldn't anymore. I was anxious when my uncle picked up the bowl but he looked sheepish and didn't say anything so I think he realised his mistake.
I was at the gym the other day (not wearing my glasses) and I notice a man and his son deadlifting next to me. The man reps out 225 which is pretty normal, but then his son stepped up to the bar and gets a solid 5 clean reps out! I was amazed… I call the man over with a hand gesture, and once he gets close enough, I ask him “hey man, how old is your son? He’s crazy strong for his age! (Assuming he was no more than 13).. he says what did you just say? So I repeat myself a little louder, at which point his son comes over. Once the boy comes into view, I notice it is a fully grown little person, with a bald spot. Mid 30s at least. Just two best buds at the gym together. Neither of them have a son so I couldn’t really play it off.. I felt absolutely awful and literally just picked my shit up and left lol
This happened to my dad long before I was born so sorry I don’t have all the details. My dad was in college taking a woodworking course and so they were around lots of saws and sharp things like that. One guy in the class forgot to move his hand when using the band saw and ended up cutting almost all of his fingers off in one fell swoop, apparently he didn’t even notice until he picked his hand up after and his fingers stayed on the piece of wood. Because the college was right next to the hospital and the teacher put the fingers in ice the guy had his fingers reattached.
In high school I watched a kid in shop class horsing around with his friends and then, trying to get away or something, he turned and ran right into a piece of sheet metal sticking off a shelf, right at temple level. He was fine after hospital but he essentially half-scalped himself. Gives me the jeebies just thinking about it 20 years later. So much blood.
You know that thought we've all heard and suffered imagining: putting a took pick in between your toenail and then kicking it? Something similar happened to me once by accident. I was walking into the kitchen and suddenly felt a very sharp pain on the tip of my big toe as I was move my right leg forward to take another step. Immediately assumed I may have stepped on glass, looked down to see a toothpick sticking out the top of my toe. Didn't go in far at all but enough to hit a nerve.
Couple years ago, I was hanging out with my SO. He was a really good partner and we shared mutual trust. Of course, like any relationship, we had a rocky patch and after an argument, I decided I’d catch up with my mother whom I haven’t seen in almost 3 years. In an effort to recoup my marriage, I came home after taking some time to breathe, with my mother behind me — and we stumble upon my SO’s penis knife on the counter upon walking in through the front door. Most awkward moment of my life.
A few years ago my teacher was moving some shelves, the ones with the wheels on them, and she accidentally rolled over her big toe, completely tearing the nail off. She kept the nail in a jar and showed it to us as kids...
Two bitches in highschool smacked me over the head with a math book full strength and I toughed it out because we'd been friends for 2 years. I had a headache a year. Cfs leak, and the negative pressure made my wisdom teeth grow into my sinus cavity because my mom kept finding ways to deny me treatment, the spinal blood patch.I had to move into other family's house to even get the wisdom teeth removed. I have crps type 1 now, and it's safe to say I hate people and needles in my spine, and you can see damage on my brain in mris.
Jesus Christ that’s horrible. Fuck those girls who hit you in the head, they should have known that something as heavy as a textbook could cause serious damage. I hope they saw some kind of justice for all that pain they caused you…
I make and sell penis knives and weirdly people have been asking for absurdly large ones in the last few hours. I don’t know how much smegma these guys generate but anyone needing a 22 inch penis machete has problems.
I was making a hole in a belt with a swiss army knife (knowing full well I should have been using something that locked open) and slammed the blade closed on my thumb splitting the end of it in half through the nail and down to the bone
Y'all, John is a mohel. The penis knife was what he takes to a bris. What he was getting on to when his wife was out was some overtime at the synagogue.
We were on a train bound for Bangkok, Thailand. It was an overnight train, I think the estimated travel time was over 12hours. Due to this, me and my friends decided to change in our pajamas so that we’d feel comfortable during the train ride. I also decided to change my underwear because I was on my period.
My dad accidentally drilled an electric screwdriver partly into his finger, he had to reverse the drive to get it out. His finger now has a very large, stiff lump on it.
Notme but my brother. ADHD runs in the damily, we're all clumsy and have poor impulse control, bad situational awareness, the whole thing. My brother's is especially bad and it has led to many injuries in the past, broken bones ect. My mom is amazing at first aid thanks to us.
This happened to my dad around 30 years ago. We lived in rural Northern Ireland and there was a very decrepit old hermit type fella who lived in a shack out in the hills. You'd see him occasionally out picking berries and whatnot. He'd always make himself scarce once you spotted him. My dad was one of the few people who knew him, as their dads had known each other.
Did he tell anyone? Or is this dudes skeleton still just lying there?
I’ve seen (well heard) this a weird amount of times in my life, especially now that I work for a private pharmacy that only delivers.
I s'pose that gives a whole new meaning to 'Go blow it out yer arse'.
Buckle in cause this ones a long on.
16 and diverticulitis?? Dude no
Glad at least you are recovering.
Holy shit dude
I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're ok now
Omg this is terrifying. My fiance just got diagnosed with diverticulitis at 29.... I'm so glad his wasn't at this stage. I'm sorry you had to go through all that!
Right i’ll give it a shot.
I saw some poor chap do just that, but on the hinge of a windsurf, he basically scooped his gashed scrotum into his hands like a ww2 soldier holds his guts. It was gruesome
I tripped while carrying a knife last Saturday. Ended up cutting my arm open to the subcutaneous fat layer. Needed 10 stitches. (I have pictures of the stitches, not the original wound)
Still have to clean up the rest of the blood.
Was it your penis knife that you were carrying?
Ooh, my cousin has something like this happen. He broke his ankle in a basketball game, had to get crunches and a cast. Two days later, in the bathroom he slips and falls onto one of the large glass candles. He fell on top of it and it impaled his arm.
This reminds me of a time I was washing dishes as a kid and we store our dishes in the washer cuz Asian. Well, I’ll never forget bending down to set a pot in the machine and I let a knife jab me right in the forehead. Would’ve been a really stupid way to die lol
Yo somebody message this dude if he doesn’t reply and tell us wtf a penis knife is
He scrapes his foreskin crust out with a butter knife because he doesn’t know how to clean in the shower.
what is all this about a penis knife?
This problem with the penis knife is just like the one with the rat glove
Had a back surgery in 2018…7 months later I started my dream job. 4 months in I get into a work accident and my newly fixed back gets fucked over… I get let go during Covid and during my workers comp case. 2 years later I’m finally better and land a great job and my back is feeling better after therapy. I’m driving to my last workers comp appointment and an asshole t-bones me at an intersection. My car that I finally paid off is completely demolished. I get taken to hospital in a neck brace and stretcher and find out my hip is fucked, back is even more messed up and because the car was spinning wildly - my head was constantly banging against the frame of the door and window, I now have a TBI. Couldn’t work because of all my pain and my brain injury so they rescind my offer for a job. I’m now broke, having to pay for a new car and I’m constantly hurting and memory loss is a new norm.
Jesus Christ dude that’s incredibly unfair. I’m sorry, hang in there. You might need to apply for disability, SSDI if you’re an American.
God, man. I’m so sorry.
I hope the asshole who T-boned you got legally crucified. What happened to them?
I sincerely hope and believe that you can get through this. It must feel very difficult, may your future be brighter.
One of my elders are dealing with similar back and head problems, hearing him talk about it is fucking horrifying. I know words don’t really help but I hope you get better.
Did you get a personal injury lawyer???
Just reading this made me depressed
You need to apply for disability
I think I’m all out of suffer contributions (for now) after this one. I got into a fight when I was 16. One of the guys smashed a bottle (old school glass lucozade bottle) and swung at me with the nozzle. I was lucky enough to block it, but it basically gouged a chunk out of my left forearm (nerves and tendons severed. If you can imagine a downward swipe of a broken bottle’s nozzle, gouging a hole in the front of your arm). Skip forward an hour or so to the accident and emergency department of St George’s hospital in Tooting, and a nurse soaking a swab of cotton in a dish of pure iodine, looking me in the eye and saying sorry, before sticking the whole swab in what was basically a gaping flap wound hole in my arm (and twisting it around a little). Certainly woke me up! Still makes me feel weird just typing this out now, and that was a good 29 year ago.
Ooof, you know it’s gonna be bad when they apologize.
But did you win the fight?
My dad got his guts blew out with a 30-06 round rifle. This happened when I was little and I remember seeing the pictures my mom got from the hospital. Jesus fucking Christ idk how he’s still alive but he is
Pretty remarkable, a .30-06 will kill damn near anything. Your dad’s a tough bugger. Respect.
Attempted murder?
one time i was super hungry and it was like 2am so i went to the fridge and poured a bowl of cereal and ate it in fairly dark conditions. i ended up turning the light on for whatever reason and the bowl of cereal was fucking crawling with ants. i had been eating a bowl of cereal with fucking ants crawling around in it and i didn’t even fucking realize. and i downed almost the whole bowl. i just went back to bed and never thought about it again until i saw this post, so thank you so much.
i’m so glad i’m not the only one who’s done this
reminds me of the time i was in thailand and i bought a packet of lay’s. halfway through the bag and i’m thinking…these kind of fucking suck.
Protein goals met
At my old apartment every time a bag of cereal was opened and put into the pantry, it’d be infested with ants the next day and I’d have to throw it out lol.
weeatants
I had a slightly similar thing. When I was really young, probably about 4yo I was being babysat by my 14yo uncle. He made me cereal with milk and it smelt bad. He insisted it was fine and that I eat it. I tried to eat it but it tasted awful and I started crying, asking to stop. My uncle got annoyed at me and yelled that he would tell my parents and grandparents how bad I was behaving if I didn't stop complaining. I knew if that happened I'd get punished multiple times by multiple people and my nan would especially drag out the punishment. So I just did my best to eat it. I started to find actual chunks of milk by now but I was too afraid to say anything because I was a dumb kid. I ate about half the cereal before I physically couldn't anymore. I was anxious when my uncle picked up the bowl but he looked sheepish and didn't say anything so I think he realised his mistake.
I was at the gym the other day (not wearing my glasses) and I notice a man and his son deadlifting next to me. The man reps out 225 which is pretty normal, but then his son stepped up to the bar and gets a solid 5 clean reps out! I was amazed… I call the man over with a hand gesture, and once he gets close enough, I ask him “hey man, how old is your son? He’s crazy strong for his age! (Assuming he was no more than 13).. he says what did you just say? So I repeat myself a little louder, at which point his son comes over. Once the boy comes into view, I notice it is a fully grown little person, with a bald spot. Mid 30s at least. Just two best buds at the gym together. Neither of them have a son so I couldn’t really play it off.. I felt absolutely awful and literally just picked my shit up and left lol
Ooooof that’s rough. I can only imagine the embarrassment lol
This happened to my dad long before I was born so sorry I don’t have all the details. My dad was in college taking a woodworking course and so they were around lots of saws and sharp things like that. One guy in the class forgot to move his hand when using the band saw and ended up cutting almost all of his fingers off in one fell swoop, apparently he didn’t even notice until he picked his hand up after and his fingers stayed on the piece of wood. Because the college was right next to the hospital and the teacher put the fingers in ice the guy had his fingers reattached.
Oh man my shop class had something similar happen. Kid lost the tips of his fingers to the belt sander.
In high school I watched a kid in shop class horsing around with his friends and then, trying to get away or something, he turned and ran right into a piece of sheet metal sticking off a shelf, right at temple level. He was fine after hospital but he essentially half-scalped himself. Gives me the jeebies just thinking about it 20 years later. So much blood.
You know that thought we've all heard and suffered imagining: putting a took pick in between your toenail and then kicking it? Something similar happened to me once by accident. I was walking into the kitchen and suddenly felt a very sharp pain on the tip of my big toe as I was move my right leg forward to take another step. Immediately assumed I may have stepped on glass, looked down to see a toothpick sticking out the top of my toe. Didn't go in far at all but enough to hit a nerve.
I posted this before but I accidentally kicked a fork like this and it went about an inch into my big toe. Can't recommend.
I once basically tore my big toenail off when a door slammed on it. I was barely 8 and couldn't do my swimming lesson that day 😩
Story from my dads army days.
Couple years ago, I was hanging out with my SO. He was a really good partner and we shared mutual trust. Of course, like any relationship, we had a rocky patch and after an argument, I decided I’d catch up with my mother whom I haven’t seen in almost 3 years. In an effort to recoup my marriage, I came home after taking some time to breathe, with my mother behind me — and we stumble upon my SO’s penis knife on the counter upon walking in through the front door. Most awkward moment of my life.
Im sorry what the flying heck do you mean by penis knife?
what
Wtf is a penis knife
Are you and yungjohn_nash married?
A few years ago my teacher was moving some shelves, the ones with the wheels on them, and she accidentally rolled over her big toe, completely tearing the nail off. She kept the nail in a jar and showed it to us as kids...
Two bitches in highschool smacked me over the head with a math book full strength and I toughed it out because we'd been friends for 2 years. I had a headache a year. Cfs leak, and the negative pressure made my wisdom teeth grow into my sinus cavity because my mom kept finding ways to deny me treatment, the spinal blood patch.I had to move into other family's house to even get the wisdom teeth removed. I have crps type 1 now, and it's safe to say I hate people and needles in my spine, and you can see damage on my brain in mris.
Jesus Christ that’s horrible. Fuck those girls who hit you in the head, they should have known that something as heavy as a textbook could cause serious damage. I hope they saw some kind of justice for all that pain they caused you…
i swear to god if the penis knife is related to sounding
This happened around 3-4 years ago.
what the fuck is a penis knife
No no no you can’t just roll past “penis knife” and expect us to not have questions
“I’m sure any man can understand my position” no i fucking cant what is a penis knife
your what
Like a poop knife, but for your dick?
Good lord a penis knife sounds dangerous..
Tell us!!!!
This is the Saturday which the OP had in mind?
Yo wtf is a penis knife?
Your WHAT?
Remindme! 7 days
Are you and UniversalUsername married?
You ever hit up the balls fork? Feels great when used simultaneously to using a penis knife.
I don't keep my penis knife at home anymore for that exact reason.
Everyone! Everyone! Please! Let’s have some order here! We all want to get to the bottom of this dick saber controversy.
I make and sell penis knives and weirdly people have been asking for absurdly large ones in the last few hours. I don’t know how much smegma these guys generate but anyone needing a 22 inch penis machete has problems.
what the FUCK is a penis knife
I was making a hole in a belt with a swiss army knife (knowing full well I should have been using something that locked open) and slammed the blade closed on my thumb splitting the end of it in half through the nail and down to the bone
I’ve done this but I was making a hole in a piece of wood and carving. Could see my pinky bone. 0/10 recommend.
Y'all, John is a mohel. The penis knife was what he takes to a bris. What he was getting on to when his wife was out was some overtime at the synagogue.
We were on a train bound for Bangkok, Thailand. It was an overnight train, I think the estimated travel time was over 12hours. Due to this, me and my friends decided to change in our pajamas so that we’d feel comfortable during the train ride. I also decided to change my underwear because I was on my period.
My dad accidentally drilled an electric screwdriver partly into his finger, he had to reverse the drive to get it out. His finger now has a very large, stiff lump on it.
I shaddered my right elbow into 8 pieces falling off a wall.
this one has a little bit of a setup first, sorry
Notme but my brother. ADHD runs in the damily, we're all clumsy and have poor impulse control, bad situational awareness, the whole thing. My brother's is especially bad and it has led to many injuries in the past, broken bones ect. My mom is amazing at first aid thanks to us.