I made it!

  1. Be involved, help your wife/girlfriend/child’s mother as much as possible. If she plans to and can breastfeed, it can, doesn’t always but can take some time before the baby latches, before she’s producing enough, if your baby’s anything like mine it will sleep for like 20 hours for a couple days afterwards, this was kinda scary cause she lost quite a bit of weight, we’d do everything we could to wake her and she would just fall back asleep. Have patience if your partner is getting discouraged, understand mom needs a lot of things and one of those things might be you acting as a cheerleader. If you’re fortunate enough to have an extended period of time with your newborn, be present, send mom/partner to sleep while you handle the baby, while they both sleep, clean the house up, go to the pharmacy and get moms meds, get that laundry going, get to the grocery store and health willing get her whatever food she’s been craving, a cold cut sandwich, a medium rare burger, a runny egg…. My best advice is if mom is your wife, love her more that you did the day you got married and make sure she feels that shit all over. Labor and birth is a fucking wild ride and mom deserves some time in the spotlight afterwards.

  2. Be involved as much as you can during labor. You might have another child, but you will never get to experience the process again with your first. Also, this might sound weird but take care of yourself as much as possible in the hospital. You need to be there for your wife, but there will be an entire staff of people there for her. So bring snacks, bring some blankets and a pillow to sleep with, go on a walk if you need to. But mainly, soak it all in and cut the damn cord lol.

  3. If it’s a long labour (my wife was like in labour for a couple of days) and they offer you a space to sleep take it. Like I initially was like “nah, I’ll power through” but the point was made that I would be completely useless if I didn’t sleep. So get a couple hours of shut eye if it’s needed.

  4. I’d also add, it is OK to not have the experience OP had about instantly feeing like a dad, bonding, etc. movies and media paints a picture of parenthood that is far from accurate. If you don’t feel the same stuff OP wrote about, it is fine and completely normal. While parenthood has its awesome moments like this, there are going to be the days you just can’t even get out of bed and question how you can keep it up, and the euphoria of those first days will wear off. It definitely isn’t all super inspiring movie type stuff, there are days you will question every decision you’ve made and feel like an awful parent. Important thing it recognize why you have these feelings/thoughts, and do what you can to address it. Don’t keep it in and don’t be afraid to get help from others. Don’t want to be the downer or anything, but managing expectations and feelings early is a great way to prevent burnout later.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Author: admin