Incorrect sayings or words that wind you up…

  1. A friend of mine always says “jizz” instead of “gist” I would correct him but it’s too funny

  2. my old manager at costa always says expresso and went as far as to ‘correct’ our Italian barista when she said espresso

  3. I work in an espresso machine repair shop, and we have one employee that just doesn't get it and pronounces it as if there's an x. Drives me batty!

  4. My sister does this. I think she’d be horrified if she knew. I can’t decide if it’s kind of me or not to not tell her. 😂

  5. Ugh this is one of those phrases, along with "the world's your lobster", that's been ingrained in my head! Despite knowing they're wrong my first instinct is to say it that way.

  6. Damn that one’s a bit subtle, now it’s going to bug me when people say it. A problem shared is a problem doubled

  7. I work with a guy from Poland who speaks English really well except for those random complex idioms. His version is 'A Bull in a Chinese Shop'

  8. I hate this one so much. It's not really an issue in speech, because you can barely hear the difference to "could've", but when written... it's just so cringe.

  9. My company (not a call centre but corporate, on the phone) teaches us to say “yourselves…” to the people we call. I think it sounds really wank.

  10. Estate agents too, the majority I've ever spoken to refer to themselves as 'myself' when they should be saying 'me'. Also seemingly because it seems posher/more intelligent. Ironic.

  11. This one really winds me up! And it does seem to flourish in corporate settings. "we have various offers for yourself today" etc etc

  12. I'm pretty sure I've read that this was one of those hot management trends of the 90s and 2000s, where it was considered a great idea to train customer service staff to use "yourself" on purpose because it sounded more formal. Which is sort of does, but as a result it also sounds really wrong and fake to my ears. Like they're trying hard to sound respectful without actually doing so.

  13. I have an irrational hate for this one. There's a bot in some sub that will appear and educate the person who posts it. 👍🏼

  14. More spelling than saying, but ‘sneak PEAK’ instead of ‘sneak peek’. And ‘BARE with me’ instead of ‘bear’. I’d rather not thanks!

  15. Defiantly instead of definitely (I think they try to spell it with an 'a' and get autocorrected). It can lead to funny results sometimes though.

  16. At my first job - someone left a note on a filing cabinet saying a particular item had been "moved to the bottom draw".

  17. I'm bilingual in French and English and in my family we actually do say "bone-apple-teat". Other bilingualities include: "Monsieur Muscle" ("Mr. Muscle", it's actually Monsieur Propre in France); "I'm overweight and homosexual" (fatty gay - "Je suis fatigué"); And "grassy-arse" ("gracias", not French but it joined the lexicon when Mum became a Spanish teacher)

  18. Antisocial vs. asocial. If you're being antisocial, you're putting bricks through people's windows, not having a quiet night in.

  19. In almost every case the word people are looking for is unsociable. Asocial is more of a scientific word.

  20. Disinterested vs uninterested is interesting (not intended). I never knew there was a difference, and I have just googled it and in the definition of disinterested it literally says "uninterested".

  21. Is this a little northern thing ? My auntie does this with bockle and also hospickal. “We had to take likklen tut hospickal” 😂😂

  22. Is she Jamaican? Coz that's just a feature of Jamaican Patois; lickle instead of little, seckle instead of settle, bockle instead of bottle, etc, etc

  23. People who start every sentence with the word ‘So…’ really gets my goat. I know it’s not a saying but had to add it to the list.

  24. Penultimate. So many people use it as an emphasized version of ultimate as if it means it's awesome.. tho it is second from last.

  25. Anyone using the word “myself” incorrectly. It doesn’t make you sound posh, it doesn’t make you sound formal. It just makes you sound like a try hard. The word “me” or “I” should be used in 99.9% of sentences containing “myself”.

  26. When people misuse "yourself", like saying "is there anything else I can do for yourself" because they think it sounds posher/more polite.

  27. Language is eternally changing so I try not to be bothered about this sort of thing, but I definitely draw the tolerance line at "pacifically".

  28. I think people say that on Reddit to not get their comment/post deleted. People don't say it in real life, not that I've seen anyway. Also, I thought it meant kill, not dead?

  29. I think it's coming from TikTok. You can say things like die, kill, murder, gun, knife, but you can't have them in the captions (which are automatically on all videos) or write them in the comments. I guess some people starting saying unalive out loud to avoid their videos getting removed or their account banned because TikTok is ridiculous about doing that without actually checking if there is anything wrong with them.

  30. One of the problems here is old Humphry Davy, one of the earliest people to try to isolate the element, couldn’t make up his own fucking mind. He first wrote it as Aluminum, but is recorded as saying the word ‘Aluminium’ aloud in lectures around the time and before.

  31. "I refuse to STEP FOOT in that establishment" ... no, you can STEP into an establishment, or SET FOOT in it. Not STEP FOOT. Argh!

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