That’s rough. One of my friends had this problem at work with a few women. So they took an empty locker and filled it with tampons, pads, chocolate and Advil. The boss loved it and gave all the women a key to that locker on an honor system. Works great.
Heard a girl in the school bathroom crying once, and being the nice person I am, I asked if she was alright and if she needed anything. She said she had gotten her period but didn’t have her backpack with her so she couldn’t get any hygiene products she had and she didn’t want to bleed through her shorts. When I tell you I ran back to my class, grabbed my entire backpack, and flew back to the bathroom to give her options of the two sizes of pads and tampons I had. I felt like my time had finally came to help out a fellow girl. And that is why you always keep extras on you :)
Never understood dudes who act squeamish about women shitting or having periods. I helped my wife take her first visit to the loo after the birth, helped wash the blood off too. Not a big deal.
I have a friend that doesn’t want kids. She has a boyfriend for 6 years now. And at every family gathering she gets the question when the kids are coming. And she as to explain it all over again. Even her parents keep buzzing
Absolutely yes and this is where a personal decision encounters cultural "norms" that might work for the species but are really stupid for individuals. Every parent I know says that having kids is a "mixed bag" and I think the village council of old people wanting grandkids is terrified of women opting out.
I have two. And felt I’ve been fed a pack of lies from every mother I’ve ever known. Now when I meet a woman who is on the fence about kids I’m straight with them. It’s sucks. Motherhood is not some grand miracle that just makes you tired sometimes….it’s more 50/50. 50% awful 50% wonderful. Lol I’d still have ten more if I didn’t have to actually be pregnant! And don’t ever get pregnant if you have body issues! It’s a wake of depression that is incredibly hard to climb out of. Sometimes wish I’d gotten a surrogate or adopted!
Oh yes, the good ole," When are you guys having kids?" Super irritating, especially when you've tried for like 10 years. As if, A: that's the only way to do things. And B: As if everyone's ovaries are cooperative. Edit: also wanted to add, finally had a little girl after forever, and 98% of the people that used to ask that never showed up to the baby shower, or the 1st birthday. And haven't spoken to me since...so why the fuck do they even ask like they care? It's wierd.
My fiancée felt so bad when we first started dating. It was a while before we farted in front of one another, but after a couple months I just said fuck it and did it. She literally started clapping excitedly because she no longer felt so stressed about when she would inevitably have to fart in front of me
I was friends with a girl who started dating someone I was a casual acquaintance with. It was a really cute relationship because both were excellent humans. But, she one time asked me, "how... how do you poop when your GF is visiting.... Do you just hold it tell she leaves, that's what I do when he comes over."
I feel like women in general feel the need to state that something is "so gross". It's as if they want other people to know that they are against filth and bad odors. It's weird. It's like if they don't say something, they think other people will think they like it.
Day 3 into our relationship, me taking a shower. Wife walked in: "Where do you stand with farting?" Me: "I'm ok with it" Wife: "Good" She let out a ripper of a fart and walked out. We've been out farting each other for 9 years now.
Oh, I feel that. It sucks so much how women are pressured into being physically appealing, as if their whole life should revolve around that. And then big companies and media make a profit out of selling young girls all those freaky and sometimes dangerous ways to "become beautiful".
There’s this lady Pilates instructor on tiktok who focuses on Pilates for people with disabilities because she herself is disabled and didn’t have anybody to cater for people like her. So many men were so extremely cruel to her, calling her ugly and saying she will die alone. She made a video response that went viral where she said she gets it, she is ugly. The whole thing was just sad
I don’t like makeup (just not a fan), and as a 40 year old woman the amount of comments I get is staggering. “Did you forget to put on your face this morning?” Or “you look sick” or “whoops look like you forgot something!” My face is mine, I don’t have to decorate it if I don’t want to.
I had a therapist tell me "I know you think you're ugly because you never wear makeup" I didn't reply. Then he literally screamed at me "You're beautiful!" But like an angry kind of scream. I NEVER went back.
I quit wearing makeup when I worked customer service because creeps made me feel unsafe. I slowly stopped doing my hair and wore baggier clothes because I'm there to work not flirt. It kind of worked but not much. "Wow your so pretty! You should do your hair and makeup! " no thanks, you fucks ruined that for me.
I had the opposite problem, When i was a teen-20s my mom would disapprove of my wearing makeup..i "shouldnt be covering my face up" and "falling for traditional gender roles". i think she felt like i was betraying all the ideals that she protested about in the 70s...
An ex of mine once got mad at me for not wearing makeup for the first dinner I had with his parents. But I WAS wearing makeup. So he said it should’ve been more. Then later told me his parents didn’t like me bc I looked sloppy or some shit
Fun fact: Women can go bald, it's just usually connected with some disease. I've been losing my hair a lot lately, and my bf was like 'women don't go bald."
This. I have alopecia and it's been an ongoing issue since I was 15. I finally shaved my entire head 4 years ago. People kept checking in about my "Britney moment" 😒 like no, I'm mentally fine, but this scraggly-ass hair isn't.
I once borrowed my girlfriend's sweatpants to go out because it was cold, I didn't have warm pants with me, and they were comfy. My phone couldn't stay in my pocket no matter what I tried! Sit on a chair? Phone on the ground. Put shoes on? Phone on ground. Make a left turn on an e-scooter? OH FUCK, PHONE ON THE ROAD!
My god eating while female in an office with other women. If I wanted a doughnut “oh you’re so lucky you can have doughnuts”. If I didn’t want a doughnut “well I guess that’s why you look like that”. If I had one doughnut earlier in the day and checked again later as a snack because I was working late and broke enough to want to take advantage of any perk I could “look out, she’s coming for the doughnuts…”.
Whatever we want to do ... I've been insulted for wearing shirts/jeans, gaming, not wearing make up, not wearing high heels, and so on. I fail to see why people think it's justified to judge let alone insult me and so many others based on absolutely normal things.
Never knew how bad this was until my neighbour saw my daughter doing an engine rebuild with me a few years back. Had one of those "she shouldn't be doing that heh heh heh, why doesn't she do girl things" it's like, bro you for real. She actually enjoyed that, she still helps me doing oil changes and other stuff in the garage 5-6 years later. Kinda munted some of us (including myself) only realise this attitude exists until our daughters are put in this situation.
I’m in construction as both a job and a hobby. It’s insane the amount of comments I get from men about how my work pants are way too clean (because I prefer to get paint on the walls and not my clothes) or how I should be careful when installing cabinets cause I might “chip a nail.” But maybe they’re just salty cause I’m their boss.
Indeed. I'm a Trekkie and some rando decided to give me a pop quiz on Starfleet captains and what they're known. Little did he know that I had consumed, at that point, every piece of Trek media that had ever hit the screen.
I refuse to dye my hair and if one more moron tells me I need to color it to keep my husband happy they're going to be slapped. My husband encourages me NOT to color it bc he likes the silver.
Yes! My mom recently stopped dying her hair to let her grey grow out… My dad does not love it and it really bums me out to see him react like that. Other women, however, give her tons of compliments on it :)
I was 19 the first time my dad told me I was becoming a spinster. He thinks anyone that is single is depressed, but strangely his scorn is reserved for women, men he pities. He insults women and wonders what’s wrong with them.
Wow. This. I don’t feel natural with a smile plastered on my face. I was at a fair and the guys behind the games on the microphone were like, “smile! It’s not THAT BAD!” As I was searching for my 7 year old son who wandered off
I've been told to smile....while doing chemo. I wish I was joking I am not. Sorry, random guy to busy getting injected with deadly chemicals and trying not to die.
In Denmark, which is a very privileged place to live as a woman, the prime minister was told she didn't smile enough and people didn't like that, so she should smile more. Regardless of what you think of someone's political stance, what does smiling has to do with any of it? I, for one, appreciate a serious looking woman.
I went to dunkin recently and there was this gorgeous happy black woman serving my coffee in the drive through. We drove away and I said “wow she was pleasant, I hope she’s the manager” and my husband immediately said or it’s because she’s a black woman who’s forced to be overly happy so people don’t report her for being a bitch”. Was he wrong? No, woman get forced to parade around as happy pleasant bubbly being or they’re a “bitch”. It’s even worse for minority women. even after 10 years of being together he’s still the only man in my life who actively sees these things and makes an effort to not encourage it and just let women exist without playing a “role” people expect for them.
I even have a tough time finding comfortable clothing for my 4 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER because everything HAS to be spandex pants and tight shirts and tight this and that. Holy crap, they're kids. They just want to play in the sand and have mobility. Their day is done at 7:30pm anyway
Have tits. I'm a 32JJ and cannot do anything without being sexualised. I am regularly followed out of the gym by creeps or have things shouted at me walking down the street. It's a genuine concern for me that my future career will be affected by the fact that my academic achievements are often overlooked because I'm just known for having big boobs. Fml. I almost feel pressured into getting a reduction that I don't want, because it would make life easier.
Fucking hell. I know a girl with big boobs, and she gets SO MANY comments about it. She'll just be existing, minding her business, then somebody has to go and say the cringiest shit about them.
What's with gym dudes that do this? Like, do they think you're just gonna be like "hey big boy, thanks for the follow, lemme smash".... like come on...
Came here to comment this. Once your boobs are a certain size, you're assumed to be a slut and showing them off no matter what you wear. Loose crew neck T shirt? Slut. Turtleneck sweater? Slut. Vee neck T shirt? MEGA SLUT.
A woman in the office was promoted because she was very good at her job and had excellent leadership skills. Of course everyone gossiped that it was because of her large breasts, and not because she actually deserved the job. Sometimes you can't win.
I feel u mate (not literally) 34GG over here and somehow ‘tits’ has been my main descriptive my entire life despite all my achievements, actual personality and other features.
Getting angry because of very understandable things, without getting called bossy, bitchy, being on our periods, being called difficult or crazy, or gaslighting.
Agree so much on this, unfortunately as a girl I wasn't taught how to handle "negative" emotions, requested to br polite, smiley, and not-problemayic, up to a point I grew up without knowing how to stand for myself. A smaller issue: not getting angry when someone cuts in the line. A bigger issue: never requesting a raise, despite earning less than a dude from my group. A big issue: at a young age, not knowing how to oppose a molester - because I was always told to be polite and don't cause problems to adults (yes it was an adult). Still learning this skill.
I have heard abt women not being taken seriously when meek and agreeable, being called bitches when confident and decisive. Doesnt matter what they do in a workplace. Its always wrong and preferable they should stay at home I guess. Especially in mandominated fields and when she has a higher position than the men have.
Maybe I found a cheat code but no one gives me grief about that. When people ask me if I have kids, I say “nope, I have dogs.” They then get excited to talk about my dogs and skip the kid discussion.
Every time I've been asked why I don't have children yet (26 years old) and I say it's because I don't want any, I get looks of absolute horror and treated like a monster. The culture surrounding birthing is so toxic and bizarre. I get told I don't know what I want yet. I'm 26 fucking years old. I know exactly what I want it doesn't involve children in any capacity.
I’m 22 & a lot of my friends from school have gotten married/had kids. Every time I’ve been asked about wanting kids my answer is always no, then I get the immediate “You say that now, but next thing you know you’re having kids”….and I respond with the fact that I’d just get an abortion if I did end up pregnant. I have 11 siblings, Im the oldest one. I personally don’t want kids as a choice. After watching my mom raise all of us, I seen how difficult it’s been and I don’t want to go through the same thing. Also, kids in this economy? Yeah..I’ll pass.
I never used to not wear a bra -ever. I worried that others would notice and judge me negatively. That it was wrong. Now, I’m older and I just don’t give a fuck. I don’t think people ever did care as much or notice like I thought they may have. But even if they do, it’s not my problem. I go braless pretty regularly on evening dog walks.
The amount of people offended by the fact that I don’t wear bras is kinda ridiculous. Especially when it’s cold. I got a scoop of titties- a bra ain’t doing nothing for me lol
As a guy, people hardly bat an eyelid when I say I’m a childless 47 yo male and that I never want any. I think it’s because women are the ones with wombs, so they are “supposed” to fulfill their biological function. Not that I agree with this argument.
Can someone please make this happen? I have very good reasons to not have children but I really don't want to get into them every fucking time someone wonders "but whyyy?"
You reminded me of a moment in psych/child development research where grade school children were being observed during recess to find out what they were doing and what developmental tasks they are working on. After weeks of observation, the researchers realized their notes were almost entirely about boys. They were asked what the girls had been doing. “Nothing,” they said, “They just sat in groups and talked.” No info on what they talked about, group dynamics, nothing. The disregard for the dev tasks the girls were working on - social skills, friendship, self-expression, conflict resolution, humor, etc. was so blatant, it sparked entire new avenues of research.
On the same topic: interruptions in conversations. I remember a sociolinguistics class where my professor discussed an experiment that analyzed conversations between men/women, men/men, women/women.
In my office the 2 known “talkers” that everyone tries to avoid or everyone rolls their eyes at in meetings for having to chime in and rambling endlessly are both men.
You are so right! I read an article about this last week that had a strong impact on me. I'm still thinking about it. It's called A Woman's Right to Speak. Here is the link:
I noticed this with the latest female incarnation of Doctor Who. The character is known for big moralizing speeches and from the male character they seem grandiose and heroic. From the female character, they seem moralizing and preachy. Same basic type of speech, just different gender. Recognizing my own bias while watching was fascinating and upsetting.
This is too far down. I (American GenX woman who breastfed both children) can’t understand why a society that seems comfortable with women’s breasts barely covered on billboards, at football games, on commercials, at the beach, etc. cringes and clutches its pearls when a breast has a baby attached.
Trying to share a uniquely female experience and having a man come in and say "hmm as a man I've never witnessed or experienced this so it must not be true" but then God forbid you try to invalidate their experiences.
Reddit is the worst for it. Any askreddit asking for women's opinions will always have some sort of reply "well I'm sure you don't speak for all women."
I'd replace hurt with harm personally. Some fun stuff inevitably involves people getting hurt. Everything from sports, to gigs, to some stuff in the bedroom.
I just saw one of those street interviews where a guy was asked what he thought of body hair on women. He said he didn't like it when a woman was waxed smooth, because that was a sign she had been preparing for sex before the date. "She was going to give it up anyway."
Yeah. I really wanna learn some basic blacksmithing. And there's a folk school a couple miles away that has classes but I'm so fucking nervous about ever going because I do not handle confrontation well
The gaming community is the worst for this from what Ive experienced. The gatekeeping is unreal and Ive decided not to play certain things because of it. It is better these days a bit. But being a gamer as a teen girl was really frustrating.
THISSSSS!!! I absolutely hate when women call other women "pick mes" for just wanting to wear what they like...I dont wear traditionally feminine clothing because I dont like it!! Not because i think im "better" than anyone
Just the weight thing alone is so crazy. Women can just post a pic of themselves showing off a new outfit or showing an event their at or whatever, and bros will rush to the comments to discuss how they wouldn't have sex with her. Like that was never up for discussion to start with? But they always make sure everyone knows.
First one on your list hurts. We have to be so careful when rejecting a man. Most of my friends have had men turn rude, verbally abusive, or worse, after rejecting them.
Admitting she’s on her period is up there for me, too. My retired dude gym buddy was goading me for not going as hard as I could and I said it’s cause it was day 1 of my period and I was feeling a bit ouch and blech. He was like “you’re not meant to day that, I don’t want to know!” Bitch, you have been married for 40 years and have 2 daughters, you can’t pretend uterine shedding does not exist.
I think everyone should get 1-2 days a month to call out freely for things like periods and mental health. I think that it should apply to everyone, but limiting it to only women would exclude or out trans men who also experience periods.
Normalizing taking rest days in general for anyone would be nice tbh. There are days when the burnout is real and I wish I didn't need to lie about why I was taking a sick day....
Nothing pissed my mom off more than after my dad retired and started cooking, we liked it more. Basically the entire reason was while my mom was quite good at baking, she over-cooked the shit out of meat.
I'm with you here. While I think grooming in any way is a positive thing, body hair is natural and hardly offensive. Wouldn't event register in changing my opinion on a woman
ask for a pad or tampon
100% yes. I remember when I was 12 or 13 and asked the ladies in the office for a Pad from the nurse's stash.
That’s rough. One of my friends had this problem at work with a few women. So they took an empty locker and filled it with tampons, pads, chocolate and Advil. The boss loved it and gave all the women a key to that locker on an honor system. Works great.
Judging someone for that is straight asinine. Anyone who does that is braindead. End of argument.
We have a stash with pads, tampons and painkillers in every bathroom at work, and it's a godsend!
Heard a girl in the school bathroom crying once, and being the nice person I am, I asked if she was alright and if she needed anything. She said she had gotten her period but didn’t have her backpack with her so she couldn’t get any hygiene products she had and she didn’t want to bleed through her shorts. When I tell you I ran back to my class, grabbed my entire backpack, and flew back to the bathroom to give her options of the two sizes of pads and tampons I had. I felt like my time had finally came to help out a fellow girl. And that is why you always keep extras on you :)
Or not using tampons. Ik girls who judge me for not wanting to use one
Exercise, exist, and eat a banana in public
Pro tip: bring the banana to your mouth, do not bring your mouth to the banana.
Yesss, why does eating a banana feel so embarrassing 😳
Exercise Exist Eat (A Banana). It’s the new Love Laugh Love.
Well the banana thing applies to guys as well
taking a poo
Never understood dudes who act squeamish about women shitting or having periods. I helped my wife take her first visit to the loo after the birth, helped wash the blood off too. Not a big deal.
"If you think farting and pooping are gross, wait until you see me in the shower sneezing on my period."
I came here to say "pooping" and you beat me to it. How dare we!
And fart
Today i learned that women get judged for taking a shit like a normal human
Decision to have kids or not.
Every woman I know who says they don't want kids gets ' you'll grow out of it' and 'you just haven't me the right man yet' . It's total BS.
I have a friend that doesn’t want kids. She has a boyfriend for 6 years now. And at every family gathering she gets the question when the kids are coming. And she as to explain it all over again. Even her parents keep buzzing
ugh thank you. i always get the "you'll change your mind!" no bitch, i won't.
FUCKING THANK YOU!!
Absolutely yes and this is where a personal decision encounters cultural "norms" that might work for the species but are really stupid for individuals. Every parent I know says that having kids is a "mixed bag" and I think the village council of old people wanting grandkids is terrified of women opting out.
I have two. And felt I’ve been fed a pack of lies from every mother I’ve ever known. Now when I meet a woman who is on the fence about kids I’m straight with them. It’s sucks. Motherhood is not some grand miracle that just makes you tired sometimes….it’s more 50/50. 50% awful 50% wonderful. Lol I’d still have ten more if I didn’t have to actually be pregnant! And don’t ever get pregnant if you have body issues! It’s a wake of depression that is incredibly hard to climb out of. Sometimes wish I’d gotten a surrogate or adopted!
Oh yes, the good ole," When are you guys having kids?" Super irritating, especially when you've tried for like 10 years. As if, A: that's the only way to do things. And B: As if everyone's ovaries are cooperative. Edit: also wanted to add, finally had a little girl after forever, and 98% of the people that used to ask that never showed up to the baby shower, or the 1st birthday. And haven't spoken to me since...so why the fuck do they even ask like they care? It's wierd.
Age.
My wife is 9 years older than me. We’ve been together for 10 years now. She’s starting to get gray hairy and I find it beautiful. She’s a great woman.
Fart, I dated a girl who farted one time in front of me and started crying because "it's so gross"
My fiancée felt so bad when we first started dating. It was a while before we farted in front of one another, but after a couple months I just said fuck it and did it. She literally started clapping excitedly because she no longer felt so stressed about when she would inevitably have to fart in front of me
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I was friends with a girl who started dating someone I was a casual acquaintance with. It was a really cute relationship because both were excellent humans. But, she one time asked me, "how... how do you poop when your GF is visiting.... Do you just hold it tell she leaves, that's what I do when he comes over."
I had a fart so bad it made me sad. Not disgusted, irritated or bothered. Sad.
My wife consistently out farts me, I can't even compare. It's hilarious.
I feel like women in general feel the need to state that something is "so gross". It's as if they want other people to know that they are against filth and bad odors. It's weird. It's like if they don't say something, they think other people will think they like it.
Fair warning to all dates. If you lay down those rules, it’s game on. I’m a fierce competitor.
Day 3 into our relationship, me taking a shower. Wife walked in: "Where do you stand with farting?" Me: "I'm ok with it" Wife: "Good" She let out a ripper of a fart and walked out. We've been out farting each other for 9 years now.
Be ugly
Oh, I feel that. It sucks so much how women are pressured into being physically appealing, as if their whole life should revolve around that. And then big companies and media make a profit out of selling young girls all those freaky and sometimes dangerous ways to "become beautiful".
There’s this lady Pilates instructor on tiktok who focuses on Pilates for people with disabilities because she herself is disabled and didn’t have anybody to cater for people like her. So many men were so extremely cruel to her, calling her ugly and saying she will die alone. She made a video response that went viral where she said she gets it, she is ugly. The whole thing was just sad
Ugly as fuck guy here.
Not using makeup
Just any stigma about makeup tbh. Too little, too much—it’s a fight you can’t win.
I don’t like makeup (just not a fan), and as a 40 year old woman the amount of comments I get is staggering. “Did you forget to put on your face this morning?” Or “you look sick” or “whoops look like you forgot something!” My face is mine, I don’t have to decorate it if I don’t want to.
I had a therapist tell me "I know you think you're ugly because you never wear makeup" I didn't reply. Then he literally screamed at me "You're beautiful!" But like an angry kind of scream. I NEVER went back.
Or using "too much" makeup. You can't win.
I quit wearing makeup when I worked customer service because creeps made me feel unsafe. I slowly stopped doing my hair and wore baggier clothes because I'm there to work not flirt. It kind of worked but not much. "Wow your so pretty! You should do your hair and makeup! " no thanks, you fucks ruined that for me.
I had the opposite problem, When i was a teen-20s my mom would disapprove of my wearing makeup..i "shouldnt be covering my face up" and "falling for traditional gender roles". i think she felt like i was betraying all the ideals that she protested about in the 70s...
An ex of mine once got mad at me for not wearing makeup for the first dinner I had with his parents. But I WAS wearing makeup. So he said it should’ve been more. Then later told me his parents didn’t like me bc I looked sloppy or some shit
My gf never wears makeup She is the prettiest girl in the world!
I wear make up if and when I feel like it, but I’m no longer in the mentality of wearing it daily. The pandemic broke me of the habit.
Not having hair
Fun fact: Women can go bald, it's just usually connected with some disease. I've been losing my hair a lot lately, and my bf was like 'women don't go bald."
This. I have alopecia and it's been an ongoing issue since I was 15. I finally shaved my entire head 4 years ago. People kept checking in about my "Britney moment" 😒 like no, I'm mentally fine, but this scraggly-ass hair isn't.
I've got basically non existent thinning hair. Multiple strangers thought it was acceptable to tell me that I should get surgery to look better.
Or having hair growing on other places that the top of her head.
Not caring about looks.
Or aging like a normal human!
She should absolutely be “allowed” to have proper sized pockets in her clothes!
As a male I fully support this. End male-pocket dependence. Pocket-havers unite!
I once borrowed my girlfriend's sweatpants to go out because it was cold, I didn't have warm pants with me, and they were comfy. My phone couldn't stay in my pocket no matter what I tried! Sit on a chair? Phone on the ground. Put shoes on? Phone on ground. Make a left turn on an e-scooter? OH FUCK, PHONE ON THE ROAD!
eat
Reddit is cool with the other ones, but this one, no no no, no eating for you.
My god eating while female in an office with other women. If I wanted a doughnut “oh you’re so lucky you can have doughnuts”. If I didn’t want a doughnut “well I guess that’s why you look like that”. If I had one doughnut earlier in the day and checked again later as a snack because I was working late and broke enough to want to take advantage of any perk I could “look out, she’s coming for the doughnuts…”.
underrated
Whatever we want to do ... I've been insulted for wearing shirts/jeans, gaming, not wearing make up, not wearing high heels, and so on. I fail to see why people think it's justified to judge let alone insult me and so many others based on absolutely normal things.
You're not dressed like business casual barbie? Disgusting
Having an interest in things that are known to be liked by predominantly men
Never knew how bad this was until my neighbour saw my daughter doing an engine rebuild with me a few years back. Had one of those "she shouldn't be doing that heh heh heh, why doesn't she do girl things" it's like, bro you for real. She actually enjoyed that, she still helps me doing oil changes and other stuff in the garage 5-6 years later. Kinda munted some of us (including myself) only realise this attitude exists until our daughters are put in this situation.
static Xbox 360 mic: "yOuR a GiRl GaMeR!?" lobby starts screeming
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Oh you like Lord of the Rings?
Anyone that’s saying that doesn’t happen is full of absolute shit
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I’m in construction as both a job and a hobby. It’s insane the amount of comments I get from men about how my work pants are way too clean (because I prefer to get paint on the walls and not my clothes) or how I should be careful when installing cabinets cause I might “chip a nail.” But maybe they’re just salty cause I’m their boss.
Yup. But then women/girls get called “pick me girls.” It’s annoying.
Indeed. I'm a Trekkie and some rando decided to give me a pop quiz on Starfleet captains and what they're known. Little did he know that I had consumed, at that point, every piece of Trek media that had ever hit the screen.
All of my kids love D&D and my 2 daughters get made fun of constantly for it, saying it's a boys game.
Age in peace.
I, for one, embrace the hallmarks of age. When people bring it up, I tell them that getting old is the privilege of the lucky.
I refuse to dye my hair and if one more moron tells me I need to color it to keep my husband happy they're going to be slapped. My husband encourages me NOT to color it bc he likes the silver.
Yes! My mom recently stopped dying her hair to let her grey grow out… My dad does not love it and it really bums me out to see him react like that. Other women, however, give her tons of compliments on it :)
Being single. Especially older and single.
Have you had the "When are you getting married... You're so pretty though"
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I was 19 the first time my dad told me I was becoming a spinster. He thinks anyone that is single is depressed, but strangely his scorn is reserved for women, men he pities. He insults women and wonders what’s wrong with them.
Not smiling all the time.
My wife had told this story many times.
Wow. This. I don’t feel natural with a smile plastered on my face. I was at a fair and the guys behind the games on the microphone were like, “smile! It’s not THAT BAD!” As I was searching for my 7 year old son who wandered off
I've been told to smile....while doing chemo. I wish I was joking I am not. Sorry, random guy to busy getting injected with deadly chemicals and trying not to die.
In Denmark, which is a very privileged place to live as a woman, the prime minister was told she didn't smile enough and people didn't like that, so she should smile more. Regardless of what you think of someone's political stance, what does smiling has to do with any of it? I, for one, appreciate a serious looking woman.
Move to a Slavic country. The act of not smiling is much more normalised there.
Seriously! “Mister I am just trying to buy my groceries in peace.“ I do not owe you a smile.
I went to dunkin recently and there was this gorgeous happy black woman serving my coffee in the drive through. We drove away and I said “wow she was pleasant, I hope she’s the manager” and my husband immediately said or it’s because she’s a black woman who’s forced to be overly happy so people don’t report her for being a bitch”. Was he wrong? No, woman get forced to parade around as happy pleasant bubbly being or they’re a “bitch”. It’s even worse for minority women. even after 10 years of being together he’s still the only man in my life who actively sees these things and makes an effort to not encourage it and just let women exist without playing a “role” people expect for them.
Instead of RBF. It's just Resting Face (RF).
I went through the drive thru around 9pm one night. The guy at the window told me to smile. I wasn't in a bad mood, just had a long day.
Be comfortable in clothing.
I even have a tough time finding comfortable clothing for my 4 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER because everything HAS to be spandex pants and tight shirts and tight this and that. Holy crap, they're kids. They just want to play in the sand and have mobility. Their day is done at 7:30pm anyway
The only both comfy and fashionable thing I own are sweaters, and I can only wear those when it’s cold >.>
Nearly anything, same as any other human being.
I was going to comment ‘exist’
This is pretty much the exact answer I had, but in reverse:
Everything short of like, crimes
Best answer
Adjust bras in public.
I've never thought about this, do anyone really judge for adjusting your bra?
Adjust your bra freely!!! No one really cares. More important to be comfy rather than not
Dude I adjust my balls in public all the time, trust me adjusting your bra wouldn't be that big of a deal
Being in a bad mood.
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Have tits. I'm a 32JJ and cannot do anything without being sexualised. I am regularly followed out of the gym by creeps or have things shouted at me walking down the street. It's a genuine concern for me that my future career will be affected by the fact that my academic achievements are often overlooked because I'm just known for having big boobs. Fml. I almost feel pressured into getting a reduction that I don't want, because it would make life easier.
Fucking hell. I know a girl with big boobs, and she gets SO MANY comments about it. She'll just be existing, minding her business, then somebody has to go and say the cringiest shit about them.
What's with gym dudes that do this? Like, do they think you're just gonna be like "hey big boy, thanks for the follow, lemme smash".... like come on...
Came here to comment this. Once your boobs are a certain size, you're assumed to be a slut and showing them off no matter what you wear. Loose crew neck T shirt? Slut. Turtleneck sweater? Slut. Vee neck T shirt? MEGA SLUT.
A woman in the office was promoted because she was very good at her job and had excellent leadership skills. Of course everyone gossiped that it was because of her large breasts, and not because she actually deserved the job. Sometimes you can't win.
I feel u mate (not literally) 34GG over here and somehow ‘tits’ has been my main descriptive my entire life despite all my achievements, actual personality and other features.
Getting angry because of very understandable things, without getting called bossy, bitchy, being on our periods, being called difficult or crazy, or gaslighting.
You forgot hysterical
Agree so much on this, unfortunately as a girl I wasn't taught how to handle "negative" emotions, requested to br polite, smiley, and not-problemayic, up to a point I grew up without knowing how to stand for myself. A smaller issue: not getting angry when someone cuts in the line. A bigger issue: never requesting a raise, despite earning less than a dude from my group. A big issue: at a young age, not knowing how to oppose a molester - because I was always told to be polite and don't cause problems to adults (yes it was an adult). Still learning this skill.
I have heard abt women not being taken seriously when meek and agreeable, being called bitches when confident and decisive. Doesnt matter what they do in a workplace. Its always wrong and preferable they should stay at home I guess. Especially in mandominated fields and when she has a higher position than the men have.
Also, the other way - not being treated seriously because being angry or annoyed might look "cute", especially if the woman's short
There is a study that women that show disagreeability are judged more harshly than when men do it as well.
Not wanting to have children
Yes. I cannot explain how people look at you when you say you're childless and happy to remain that way.
Maybe I found a cheat code but no one gives me grief about that. When people ask me if I have kids, I say “nope, I have dogs.” They then get excited to talk about my dogs and skip the kid discussion.
Every time I've been asked why I don't have children yet (26 years old) and I say it's because I don't want any, I get looks of absolute horror and treated like a monster. The culture surrounding birthing is so toxic and bizarre. I get told I don't know what I want yet. I'm 26 fucking years old. I know exactly what I want it doesn't involve children in any capacity.
On that note, women should be able to tie their tubes without "husband's approval"
“Oh, you’ll change your mind”
I’m 22 & a lot of my friends from school have gotten married/had kids. Every time I’ve been asked about wanting kids my answer is always no, then I get the immediate “You say that now, but next thing you know you’re having kids”….and I respond with the fact that I’d just get an abortion if I did end up pregnant. I have 11 siblings, Im the oldest one. I personally don’t want kids as a choice. After watching my mom raise all of us, I seen how difficult it’s been and I don’t want to go through the same thing. Also, kids in this economy? Yeah..I’ll pass.
Walk outside in the middle of the night, or at any time of the day. Not being attacked and wearing whatev the eff they want
Wearing no bra.
I never used to not wear a bra -ever. I worried that others would notice and judge me negatively. That it was wrong. Now, I’m older and I just don’t give a fuck. I don’t think people ever did care as much or notice like I thought they may have. But even if they do, it’s not my problem. I go braless pretty regularly on evening dog walks.
The amount of people offended by the fact that I don’t wear bras is kinda ridiculous. Especially when it’s cold. I got a scoop of titties- a bra ain’t doing nothing for me lol
I wish I could get away with no bra. I have too much boob for that >.<
Choosing not to have children.
As a guy, people hardly bat an eyelid when I say I’m a childless 47 yo male and that I never want any. I think it’s because women are the ones with wombs, so they are “supposed” to fulfill their biological function. Not that I agree with this argument.
Can someone please make this happen? I have very good reasons to not have children but I really don't want to get into them every fucking time someone wonders "but whyyy?"
Speak!
You reminded me of a moment in psych/child development research where grade school children were being observed during recess to find out what they were doing and what developmental tasks they are working on. After weeks of observation, the researchers realized their notes were almost entirely about boys. They were asked what the girls had been doing. “Nothing,” they said, “They just sat in groups and talked.” No info on what they talked about, group dynamics, nothing. The disregard for the dev tasks the girls were working on - social skills, friendship, self-expression, conflict resolution, humor, etc. was so blatant, it sparked entire new avenues of research.
As a man I've seen this play out in the engineering world and I hate it.
On the same topic: interruptions in conversations. I remember a sociolinguistics class where my professor discussed an experiment that analyzed conversations between men/women, men/men, women/women.
In my office the 2 known “talkers” that everyone tries to avoid or everyone rolls their eyes at in meetings for having to chime in and rambling endlessly are both men.
You are so right! I read an article about this last week that had a strong impact on me. I'm still thinking about it. It's called A Woman's Right to Speak. Here is the link:
I noticed this with the latest female incarnation of Doctor Who. The character is known for big moralizing speeches and from the male character they seem grandiose and heroic. From the female character, they seem moralizing and preachy. Same basic type of speech, just different gender. Recognizing my own bias while watching was fascinating and upsetting.
Most dates I've been on the dude won't stfu for a second unless I'm asking him a question about himself. It's like an interview.
Breast feed in public
That's completely normal in Germany..
This is too far down. I (American GenX woman who breastfed both children) can’t understand why a society that seems comfortable with women’s breasts barely covered on billboards, at football games, on commercials, at the beach, etc. cringes and clutches its pearls when a breast has a baby attached.
Yes, let’s just starve our children for your comfort…
Speak about their experiences without hundreds of guys trying to correct them saying “that’s not true, I never seen it happen.”
Trying to share a uniquely female experience and having a man come in and say "hmm as a man I've never witnessed or experienced this so it must not be true" but then God forbid you try to invalidate their experiences.
"Well I've never seen it happen so clearly it just never happens, ever, and you're just being dramatic"
Reddit is the worst for it. Any askreddit asking for women's opinions will always have some sort of reply "well I'm sure you don't speak for all women."
Everything that men can do without being judged
Whatever the fuck they want as long as she's not hurting herself or others.
I'd replace hurt with harm personally. Some fun stuff inevitably involves people getting hurt. Everything from sports, to gigs, to some stuff in the bedroom.
Not have to wear make up all the time.
Liking sex
I just saw one of those street interviews where a guy was asked what he thought of body hair on women. He said he didn't like it when a woman was waxed smooth, because that was a sign she had been preparing for sex before the date. "She was going to give it up anyway."
of course I figure this is even weirder. because men want women to like sex - with them.
Completely agree. But also hating it.
Yes! I was gunna say. To fuck, be fucked or be naked jeeze!
I been called a lesbian because I rejected guys who just wanted to hook up. It's not that I want to be single it's just I haven't found the one
Making the decision to NEVER get married!
Women should allowed to have the right to be upset when they’re looked down on because they’re a woman
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Yeah. I really wanna learn some basic blacksmithing. And there's a folk school a couple miles away that has classes but I'm so fucking nervous about ever going because I do not handle confrontation well
The gaming community is the worst for this from what Ive experienced. The gatekeeping is unreal and Ive decided not to play certain things because of it. It is better these days a bit. But being a gamer as a teen girl was really frustrating.
"NoOoOoo it's not hobbies when women do it go find something else!"
Being tomboys forever without people accusing them of internalized misogyny and transphobia.
THISSSSS!!! I absolutely hate when women call other women "pick mes" for just wanting to wear what they like...I dont wear traditionally feminine clothing because I dont like it!! Not because i think im "better" than anyone
I'd like people to stop saying that tomboys are trans. Not disagreeing with you, but adding to it.
Do something that is considered masculine
Just the weight thing alone is so crazy. Women can just post a pic of themselves showing off a new outfit or showing an event their at or whatever, and bros will rush to the comments to discuss how they wouldn't have sex with her. Like that was never up for discussion to start with? But they always make sure everyone knows.
First one on your list hurts. We have to be so careful when rejecting a man. Most of my friends have had men turn rude, verbally abusive, or worse, after rejecting them.
1000% agreed!!
Live their lives.
How about making her own sexual, reproductive, and medical decisions?
Being pretty but with a little bit of a belly and still being able to get a partner who won't judge!
Not being in the mood for whatever she is not in the mood.
Take rest days when having a period
Admitting she’s on her period is up there for me, too. My retired dude gym buddy was goading me for not going as hard as I could and I said it’s cause it was day 1 of my period and I was feeling a bit ouch and blech. He was like “you’re not meant to day that, I don’t want to know!” Bitch, you have been married for 40 years and have 2 daughters, you can’t pretend uterine shedding does not exist.
Or be accused of having her period bc someone pissed her off.
I think everyone should get 1-2 days a month to call out freely for things like periods and mental health. I think that it should apply to everyone, but limiting it to only women would exclude or out trans men who also experience periods.
OH I wish! This would be bliss! My cramps are sometimes so severe I can't even walk or stand
Normalizing taking rest days in general for anyone would be nice tbh. There are days when the burnout is real and I wish I didn't need to lie about why I was taking a sick day....
Being terrible at cooking or other chores
Nothing pissed my mom off more than after my dad retired and started cooking, we liked it more. Basically the entire reason was while my mom was quite good at baking, she over-cooked the shit out of meat.
Breastfeeding 👍🏽
Yep. They shouldn't be forced to breastfeed in the toilet where all the germs are or to starve the baby to please others.
Not shaving body hair. Why can dudes have hairy arms and legs but women have to shave or wax to look "presentable"
I'm with you here. While I think grooming in any way is a positive thing, body hair is natural and hardly offensive. Wouldn't event register in changing my opinion on a woman
Take a day off when period pain is not manageable
Exist.
Not have to wear a bra. They all get uncomfortable after a while.
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Play video games, Play DnD, Lift weights, play/compete/do sports
Seeing the game chst sometimes when i play with video games with my female friend really is disgusting.
Not wanting kids, I want kids but some people don't but woman always get judged if they don't want kids