Finland has drank themselves to the point where social awkwardness has been replaced with an urgent need to tell everyone about all the times they beat Sweden in ice hockey
They’re also the ones saying they’re about to leave for the night but falls into a conversation each step towards the door and says goodbye countless times while their children are waiting by the door with their shoes on ready to leave.
And after a lot of drinking, they go to the bedroom to "have a private conversation" and when they come out, they don't look at each other and go to opposite ends of the party
Sweden is either looking anxiously at their watch, wondering when it's socially acceptable to go home, or the drunkest person at the party. No in between.
Not outside. At the kitchen window, with a glass of wine, pretending they're going to help once they finish their cigarette, only to chat with the other guests looking to vent about another country. Listening just enough to start long monologues psychoanalysing every relationship at the party. Always ending up in endless debates with their oldest frenemies when everyone else got bored or pissed off.
The Polynesian islands are all Aunties sitting on the ground with food stacked on their plates all gossiping to each other about the famous Aunty (Hawaii) that is singing on stage.
Heyyy dats my cousin you know she’s real famous kine right now, just got a part in that Disney movie! They’re shooting it over in Nu’uanu Pali right now!
Maybe a small amount of bickering at first but by 10 PM they’re all drunk and singing the same songs they’ve been singing together for the past 70 years
Germany is trying to convince everyone that they ARE in fact funny and stands next to the trash can scolding people for not separating their rubbish properly. They've put their towel on the chair closest to the buffet before anyone else was there.
And silently arguing with Indonesia and Singapore as to who brought the best tasting food, yet ganging up on anyone brave enough to say the rendang served needs to be crispy. Such blasphemy, Astaghfirullahalazim...
Spain and Argentina finally show up together at 3, both drunk, to an almost dying party but when they arrive the real party begins, Argentina starts offering fernet to everyone and Spain goes straigth to the dj table and changes the mood completely
Norway is also standing in a (different and far away!) corner, drinking coffee that is mostly moonshine. When they are drunk enough, they will suddenly become extrovert, join the party fun and try to hook up with any other drunks, possibly sweden or denmark. Maybe they have some mandarins and kviklunsj with them for the trip home. They might try to go on a date with their hook up when sober, which will be extremly awkward as they no longer talk.
Meanwhile, Jamaica and Trinidad are forcing their rice and peas on Nigeria and Ghana to see which is better. When Ghana and Nigeria call it a tie, they bring out the rum to see which is better.
Out on the lawn Nigeria and Ghana are joined by all their pals: Ethiopia, Big Congo, Little Congo, Tanzania, South Africa, Kenya, Uganda, Angola, Mozambique, Cameroon, Madagascar, Ivory Coast, Niger, Burkina Faso, Mali, Malawi, Zambia, Senegal, Chad, Somalia, Zimbabwe, South Sudan, Rwanda, Guinea, Burundi, Benin, Sierra Leone, Togo, Central African Republic, Liberia, Mauritania, Namibia, Gambia, Botswana, Gabon, Lesotho, Guinea-Bissau, Equatorial Guinea, Mauritius, Eswatini, Djibouti...
America brought solo cups for all and set up beer pong. Despite bringing good craft beer, everyone else just assumes the beer is terrible and refuses to try it, while making fun of America’s beer.
France is chatting with the elite and brought her own food. She spends lots of time criticizing the artwork and furniture in the room. After a few glasses of champagne, she threatens to guillotine the UK.
Venezuela is trying to get everyone's atention by singing overly loud and presuming he can dance to everything, while in the back is his brother Colombia ashamed and trying to calm him down
South africa is out on the bbq(braai) drinking an ungodly amount of brandy and will most likely still be one of the last people standing at the end along with Australia
Germany used to pick fights at every party to the point where she wasn't invited anymore. Now she's back and very soft spoken and happy to explain to everyone how the anger management classes and therapy really turned her life around.
Portugal is happily inviting new arrivals to eat. It doesn't know if they're countries or not, or if they were even invited, there's plenty to go round! This has the unfortunate side effect of many things going missing over the course of the evening.
America looks lovingly at France, looks away when she looks back and starts lifting a heavy object and telling everyone how strong he is. France rolls her eyes and cuts a filter off another cigarette.
New Zealand got the invite, but couldn’t be fucked as it’s too far to travel, so stayed at home. Got blazed and had a roast for dinner followed by 10 to many drinks 🤙🏻
I can imagine the Australians drinking a bit and eating a bunch of the snacks, maybe even trying to teach everyone the nutbush so everyone can all dance together
Canada is making polite and friendly conversation, ensuring that everyone feels included and being mindful and inclusive of everyone's differences. Charming as he is Performative, putting on his best act to fool people into believing him to be the kinder, more amiable and more civilized brother of the USA when in truth he couldn't care less about anyone and just came in to network and boost his image.
You know how sometimes at gatherings you’re talking to some people for a long time and then one person talks for the first time and you’re like holy crap I forgot you were here? That’s Canada.
Romania is explaining to everyone that we don't have vampires.
All the balkans will bring homemade alcohol, fight each other and then later talk like besties again. Can confirm, I’m from Bulgaria.
Nobody noticed that Malta showed up
Who?
I'm glad someone brought some nonalcoholic malt drinks to the party.
Germany is the next door neighbor. We came over to complain about the noise, printed copy of the HOA rules and regulations in hand.
*printed and laminated copy
Canada is telling everyone which actors are Canadian
Canada also arrived ten minutes early and waited in their car to come in exactly on time because being even a minute late might be taken as a slight
Spain hasn't even left home yet, but has told everyone they are on the way.
“Estoy llegando” = they haven’t started getting ready
Your political cousin Mexico learned this from you then...
Republic of Moldova is explaining everyone who it is
Moldova is also missing an arm and a foot
"IT'S MOLDOVA, NOT MOLDAVIA!"
Finland has drank themselves to the point where social awkwardness has been replaced with an urgent need to tell everyone about all the times they beat Sweden in ice hockey
Finland is climbing on a statue and singing their national anthem because they heard their name mentioned in a conversation.
Soccer and football nations are not impressed, but want to hear the story again, how Finland spanked Russia…
Probably all fighting and if you go to the kitchen you'll find New Zealand and Iceland casually chatting
And nobody has noticed they're not with the group.
The Philippines already bringing out their bags and getting food to go.
Philippines is also the one hogging the karaoke machine
They’re also the ones saying they’re about to leave for the night but falls into a conversation each step towards the door and says goodbye countless times while their children are waiting by the door with their shoes on ready to leave.
China and India are having a fight and
Bhutan looks on from a safe distance.
Czechia and slovakia are the couple that broke up, but still spend all their time at the party together.
And after a lot of drinking, they go to the bedroom to "have a private conversation" and when they come out, they don't look at each other and go to opposite ends of the party
You could say their divorce was amicable. Velvet, even.
Sweden is either looking anxiously at their watch, wondering when it's socially acceptable to go home, or the drunkest person at the party. No in between.
I see now that I'm a Swede at heart.
Denmark is mocking Sweden for being a drunk that always drinks too much and also for being a poor drunk that drinks too little
As a Finn, I must admit that you guys are pretty similar in some ways
Austria being sad about having met all the guests in the past but not being remembered by anybody.
Oh hey there, uh, Germany, right?
I was about to say one word: complaing. Yes, we're whining and wailing all day long.
As an Austrian I'm unironically proud that this comment is sorted higher than the German ones
Morocco, drinking mint tea somewhere it can't be seen.
Probably fighting with Algeria though
people keep asking it if it can do magic for some reason
Greece fighting with Turkey, then passing out hugged, then fighting again.
Woke up. “Why are you hugging me?” Starts fighting again
That's just the entire Balkan tbh
Bangladesh explaining every country why they are not India or Pakistan
“So you guys never had a Beatle organize a concert for you?”
Ireland is having their first pint of Guinness and everyone is already making fun of them for their 'drinking problem'
“I don’t have a drinking problem. I have a drinking solution.”
Now and then US and China are looking at each other angrily and everyone gasps.
But they continiue to buy eachother drinks
Secretly they go off to money hate fuck in the closet.
They take off their tee shirts to fight. Then China points at the label and smiles.. awww you wore what I gave you
France is outside smoking cigarettes
Not outside. At the kitchen window, with a glass of wine, pretending they're going to help once they finish their cigarette, only to chat with the other guests looking to vent about another country. Listening just enough to start long monologues psychoanalysing every relationship at the party. Always ending up in endless debates with their oldest frenemies when everyone else got bored or pissed off.
Portugal is complaining about the foreign food and that they could've eaten better in the Tasco do Zé for cheaper.
Dude 7€ for a steak, egg, rice and a salad! Zé has the best food
"what is this food? bring me a bitoque!"
Denmark brought beer, and a weird syrupy liquorice spirit that no one but Finnland is willing to try.
In the end Finland orders the stuff for all national airport shops.
Australia is getting black out drunk with the Irish and the Danish
Netherlands is making sure everyone has paid their share in expenses by sending out venmo's.
Only if the party is at our place of course, otherwise we'll wrap some of the food in tissues and stuff it in a bag for later
Lmao “ik stuur je een tikkie. Hoeveel broodjes kaas heb jij gegeten?”
We are also telling anyone who is willing to listen how we got our outfit in de 'korting'
The Polynesian islands are all Aunties sitting on the ground with food stacked on their plates all gossiping to each other about the famous Aunty (Hawaii) that is singing on stage.
Heyyy dats my cousin you know she’s real famous kine right now, just got a part in that Disney movie! They’re shooting it over in Nu’uanu Pali right now!
I want to hang out with this group
And they keep offering everyone else food until they're all so full they can't move.
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Like all older siblings, Australia won't let NZ come to the party because they're worried everyone will actually Like them more
And somehow not in any of the party pictures the next day.
New Zealand trying to invite everyone to sit on their deck, but they’re all misunderstanding him and call him a pervert.
The party is going great until the Balkan countries arrive. Then all hell breaks loose.
It's not a party until the Balkans show up.
Ungodly amount of rakia for everyone involved
Maybe a small amount of bickering at first but by 10 PM they’re all drunk and singing the same songs they’ve been singing together for the past 70 years
Except for Montenegro. They’re in an empty bedroom upstairs taking a nap.
Estonia is bragging about their fancy innovations, but they're broke as hell
Lithuania is depressed,but he brought some potato dishes and strong vodka,secretly hoping russia falls down the stairs "accidentally"
Estonia will arrive at the party 2 days late, drunken out of his mind
Czech Republic is chugging beers and complains about everything.
That's Poland too
The Philippines putting the food and drinks in plastic bags to eat at home tomorrow
Ah yes “Take outs”
The Philippines brought along the karaoke machine.
And brought enough Lumpia for 10x the guest list?
The Philippines catered the whole thing and made enough food for 5 parties.
Antarctica is outside in the cold trying to convince the doorman even if technically he is not a country he should be allowed in.
Antarctica is secretly a bunch of penguins stacked on top of each other in a trench coat.
Germany is trying to convince everyone that they ARE in fact funny and stands next to the trash can scolding people for not separating their rubbish properly. They've put their towel on the chair closest to the buffet before anyone else was there.
Until 17:00 sharp, that's when they leave.
Little do they know they're the funniest guest at the party because they're so serious.
Malaysia making the foods but no one knows anyway
And cursing at how Singapore is getting all the compliments for serving the food cooked by Malaysia.
They keep complimenting Singapore for it????
And silently arguing with Indonesia and Singapore as to who brought the best tasting food, yet ganging up on anyone brave enough to say the rendang served needs to be crispy. Such blasphemy, Astaghfirullahalazim...
Germany is calling the cops at 10 pm sharp because of loud music.
germany will slap their thighs at 9:30pm sharp and stand up with a “so”
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Anzeige ist raus
The most accurate one
Either that, or Germany is completely black out drunk on Jägermeister and Beer and is jumping all over the dance floor.
And they all reserved their chairs an hour before the party started
the nordics are standing in a corner, bullying each other
Denmark and Sweden bullying eachother with Norway following up every insult with another one, regardless of whom it was directed at
bullying sweden*
Spain hasn't even arrived yet since 22:00h is dinner time and good parties don't start until past 02:00h.
Spain was the one who came up with the super random excuse to have the party in the first place.
After living with two Spanish roommates for close to two years, can confirm.
Spain and Argentina finally show up together at 3, both drunk, to an almost dying party but when they arrive the real party begins, Argentina starts offering fernet to everyone and Spain goes straigth to the dj table and changes the mood completely
Sweden? Standing in the corner and looking at everyone having fun. Maybe tease Norway
I can absolutely see Sweden telling everyone Norway can't dance and never step on the dancefloor because that's for those extraverts who can dance.
The first hour yes, but after a few hours we will be teaching everyone else the drinking songs! Heeeeelaaan gååååååååååååååår...!!!!
Norway is also standing in a (different and far away!) corner, drinking coffee that is mostly moonshine. When they are drunk enough, they will suddenly become extrovert, join the party fun and try to hook up with any other drunks, possibly sweden or denmark. Maybe they have some mandarins and kviklunsj with them for the trip home. They might try to go on a date with their hook up when sober, which will be extremly awkward as they no longer talk.
Tuvalu 🇹🇻 keeps trying to say hello to people but they just think they're one of Britain's mates. Or they just say 'who de feck are you?'
"Oh hey you're that TV guy"
singapore being friendly but not making friends lol
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But when it arrives, it will hit on al the girls at the party
It's no longer a party.
The most realistic outcome.
Aussies are in charge of the bbq while handing out tinnies to everyone
So they are out back
Setting up Goon of Fortune on the clothesline
Nigeria 🇳🇬and Ghana 🇬🇭all brought their own jollof and are making other countries taste it to see who’s is better
Meanwhile, Jamaica and Trinidad are forcing their rice and peas on Nigeria and Ghana to see which is better. When Ghana and Nigeria call it a tie, they bring out the rum to see which is better.
Out on the lawn Nigeria and Ghana are joined by all their pals: Ethiopia, Big Congo, Little Congo, Tanzania, South Africa, Kenya, Uganda, Angola, Mozambique, Cameroon, Madagascar, Ivory Coast, Niger, Burkina Faso, Mali, Malawi, Zambia, Senegal, Chad, Somalia, Zimbabwe, South Sudan, Rwanda, Guinea, Burundi, Benin, Sierra Leone, Togo, Central African Republic, Liberia, Mauritania, Namibia, Gambia, Botswana, Gabon, Lesotho, Guinea-Bissau, Equatorial Guinea, Mauritius, Eswatini, Djibouti...
The French keep speaking in French to their English speaking peers, although they know English and nobody else knows French
If someone starts speaking French to her though, she'll switch to English.
But then Canada replies and France is still convinced no one knows French
North Korea is in a treehouse a block away trying to watch the party with “binoculars” that are just two empty paper towel rolls taped together
This is so much better than the first north Korea post.
But South Korea on the other hand just closes the windows and enjoys the party
The Vatican is trying to get some alone time with the children
The American is drinking from a red Solo cup
and america definitely brought a keg
America brought solo cups for all and set up beer pong. Despite bringing good craft beer, everyone else just assumes the beer is terrible and refuses to try it, while making fun of America’s beer.
Lebanon is trying desperately to have a good time despite having the absolute worst seat assignment.
South Africa is trying to put the electricity off 🇿🇦
And paranoidly locking all the windows and doors.
No, South Africa are still waiting for the braai coals to come to temperature after five hours of drinking.
Denmark is drunk as fuck playing with Legos in the corner
Germany joins, telling Denmark how Legos are the foundation of each engineering career…
Finland not sure if they were invited so stays at home drinking alone in underwear
The good old Kalsarikännit (TM).
Italy flirting with everything that breathes
Switzerland collecting business cards from everyone inconspicuously
Or they're just observing but not partaking in any conversation or taking any sides in the drunken brawls happening around them.
Pakistan and India on the couch watching and arguing over the cricket and who will win.
i literally did that this morning lmao
Commenting while watching the match, weren't ya?
Then somebody starts a Coke Studio song and both start vibing
USA and Australia being louder than everybody else.
Mexico is making some bomb-ass tacos while occasionally trying to approach America
"I just feel like there's a wall between us, cariño"
And brings a mariachi band to the house with no one requesting or expecting it (the reason why Germany called the police)
They are forcing everyone into tequila shots.
If New Zealand is hosting we're apologising about the weather and the behaviour of the Aussies, neither of which are under our control.
China complaining why is Taiwan here.
Or, probably shocked that Taiwan received a separate invite.
France is chatting with the elite and brought her own food. She spends lots of time criticizing the artwork and furniture in the room. After a few glasses of champagne, she threatens to guillotine the UK.
I feel like the UK and France would be arguing the whole time, and then the next day everyone finds out they slept together.
France and the UK argue horrifically until someone else tries to join in where they both team up on the new guy
Venezuela is trying to get everyone's atention by singing overly loud and presuming he can dance to everything, while in the back is his brother Colombia ashamed and trying to calm him down
South africa is out on the bbq(braai) drinking an ungodly amount of brandy and will most likely still be one of the last people standing at the end along with Australia
The Irish, the South Africans and us Aussies just seem to find eachother.
Germany used to pick fights at every party to the point where she wasn't invited anymore. Now she's back and very soft spoken and happy to explain to everyone how the anger management classes and therapy really turned her life around.
Nigeria looks at these comments and wonders how they ended up at the whitest fucking party ever. Calls up Cameroon to gtf over here.
The Caribbean countries have arrived. Meet us in the yard. We have rum and music. Bring Jollof. Don’t tell the Europeans and America.
South Korea is playing k-pop on the radio with Japan dancing to it behind them.
North Korea is looking over the fence at South Korea and Japan, staring daggers.
China’s denying that he locked his brother in the basement even though everybody saw him do it.
Meanwhile Taiwan screaming at the top of its lungs and banging at the locker door and no one noticed lmao
Russia causing strong alcohol shortages at the party
But still avoiding the licorice liquor, Denmark brought, because it looks gay.
Portugal is happily inviting new arrivals to eat. It doesn't know if they're countries or not, or if they were even invited, there's plenty to go round! This has the unfortunate side effect of many things going missing over the course of the evening.
Brazillians steal the party and put everyone to dance. It gets out of control at some point when yhe Irish join them
As a Brazilian myself, the party starts when it gets out of control
Also Brazil is the last to leave, and only goes after the metro is running again
Russia is competing with the US for attention and stealing people's drinks.
Russia is drunk and groping Ukraine.
Finland, crying in the corner because people. Until the alcohol kicks in..
Finland is trying to comfort Ukraine. They keep looking back at Russia with slanted eyes.
australia is blackout drunk and yelling incoheriantly at everyone else at 3am
Brazil is dancing and the mf brought a football and started to show off his skills for no reason.
Wont let Germany have a kick about in the back garden
The French one is showing off any bullshit cultural fun-fact while, without asking, smoking inside. Source : I’m French.
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America looks lovingly at France, looks away when she looks back and starts lifting a heavy object and telling everyone how strong he is. France rolls her eyes and cuts a filter off another cigarette.
New Zealand got the invite, but couldn’t be fucked as it’s too far to travel, so stayed at home. Got blazed and had a roast for dinner followed by 10 to many drinks 🤙🏻
I can imagine the Australians drinking a bit and eating a bunch of the snacks, maybe even trying to teach everyone the nutbush so everyone can all dance together
Canada is making polite and friendly conversation, ensuring that everyone feels included and being mindful and inclusive of everyone's differences. Charming as he is Performative, putting on his best act to fool people into believing him to be the kinder, more amiable and more civilized brother of the USA when in truth he couldn't care less about anyone and just came in to network and boost his image.
Canada is being super friendly to the USA's face, but trash-talking it behind its back to other countries.
Canada is also not going to start a fight, but is hoping someone will be a dick so he has a reason to throw down.
So Russia has only been here 5 minutes and they’ve beaten everyone up,stolen all the booze and took a massive shit in my sock drawer
A bar fight. Probably the third one by now.
Balkans in the corner of the room beating the fuck out of each other.
This is Hetalia all over again
Greece is just… partying. But also asking Germany for money to buy more drinks cause Greece is entirely broke.
... while absolutely refusing drinks from Turkey, who is solely offering Greece drinks to see if they can get them to take one.
You know how sometimes at gatherings you’re talking to some people for a long time and then one person talks for the first time and you’re like holy crap I forgot you were here? That’s Canada.