AITA for wearing a sage green dress for a wedding?

  1. I’m just gonna jump on the top comment and say, NTA, I checked your page, please report this woman for harassment. You’re 17. What the actual fuck.

  2. I went to OP’s profile and saw the messages from the bride and the dress. That dress is just so plain looking to me. It’s literally the green color of an early 2000’s VW beetle. The messages that the bride is sending this 17 year old girl is beyond messed up. If anything OP I’d say that the bride is super insecure about her own looks.

  3. not to be snarky, but have you people not ever used sage in cooking ? if i said i was wearing eggplant would you have to look that up as well ? i am actually curious

  4. My sister had her wedding about a year ago...she had all the bridesmaids wear a flashy jewel green colored dress in a style of our choosing. She was happy that the bridesmaids all looked great.

  5. It might've been the fabric that was too flashy for the bride but even still, it wasn't white or over the top. The bride shouldn't have kicked up a fuss, especially not at a minor

  6. I have hot friends. So they all looked beautiful as my bridesmaids. People were so astonished that I "let them dress that way". I was like...... I'm not so insecure that I need everyone else to be plain and ugly. My outfit was fire. People are still talking about it. I was, however, annoyed that my mom did not wear the dress she originally showed me. Her dress literally jingled so everyone turned to looked at her every time she moved. But I didn't even say anything about it cuz I didn't care that much.

  7. It is quite literally the most boring of greens. I actually hate it, generally, but I can see it being lovely in satin (it’s a very good shade to mute down the brightness of satin).

  8. This is more of "you're too attractive so make yourself uglier because it's messing with my 'perfect day'". It was not the dress because OP was also told to remove her makeup. This crazy person is short of demanding her guests to send in head shots to make sure they're not too attractive for her liking. NTA.

  9. I long for the day one of these bridezillas just drops the whole dress code schtick and just comes out with it - "No one can be hotter than me. Please uglify yourself. Thanks xoxo" Cmon, have some balls!

  10. I suspect it wasn't the color, but rather the fabric. Satin is reflective. It's also perfectly okay to wear as a guest to a wedding.

  11. The color wasn’t the problem; the problem was op is prettier than the bride and the bride couldn’t handle that so she tried to put her in a potato sack and dull her as much as she could. Op didn’t go with it but even if she did odds are she’d still be prettier than the bride and the bride still wouldn’t have been happy.

  12. NTA. If a teenager wearing a nice dress can ruin her wedding, then she DESERVES it to be ruined. What an absolutely bizarre reaction from her. God knows what she was thinking.

  13. Just about to say this—her own insecurities ruined her own day…saw the google pic of the dress and it looked beautiful and in no way inappropriate. I’m glad your parents ended up not giving any money to the bride after she accosted you. NTA

  14. Exactly. Imagine being a grown ass 27 year old adult woman who is getting married and picking a fight with a 17 year old kid. If her wedding was ruined, it was 100% due to her poor behaviour.

  15. If I were the groom I would run. This another test like being rude to cleaners and restaurant staff. Going nuts over a 17 yr dress colour says ‘controlling’

  16. NTA. People are getting too carried away with these ridiculous requests and rude behaviour at weddings. Just one more reason why weddings suck. It’s not your fault that bridezilla is insecure

  17. This is like the fifth or sixth bridezilla on this sub that has made stupid requests on their own insecurities. I don't remember what anyone else wore at my wedding I was too busy getting married

  18. Toxic wedding culture is the worst. I have idea when the concept of the bridezilla became the social norm instead of being called out as poor behaviour.

  19. So true. Expectations have been getting steadily more extravagant over the years. Its driven by the whole wedding industry who push their agenda and end up convincing women that the day needs to be 'perfect' or it's a fail. And perfect takes money. From rhe diamond ring nonsence we've all fallen for, to outrageous priced dresses to the believe its normal to have take out a mortgage to pay for it all, the hype is a money making frenzy. It's no wonder a certain type of personality gets sucked into it and suddenly, hello Bridezilla.

  20. Hope I won't insult anybody, when I read posts about weddings in USA or Europe I think "Who can willingly participate in this??" It's like brides overthink literally every move their guests make, the wedding can be completely ruined by every little thing, jeez.

  21. I requested all women to wear floor length gowns and the men to wear bow ties (any color) to my wedding so I didn’t feel so out of place in my ballgown wedding dress. Came up with a rhyming poem to put in my invitation to request this. Wanted everyone to be fancy with me. AITA? 😆😅

  22. I disagree about the 2nd part. If the wedding party is dressed in a specific color, its fair to ask guests not to wear that color. The only thing that would make this bride reasonable is if the wedding party was in sage and that was conveyed on the invitations.

  23. I would like to also add maybe stay away from the bridesmaid colour dresses if you know it. But other than that, yes you don't get to dictate what they wear. Minus a suggestion, country rustic wedding, black tie, etc.

  24. I get the point you're trying to make. I just want to add that some cultures have a different bridal colour other than white. I know red is fairly common too.

  25. Toxic wedding culture has gotten out of hand. The big problem is, it has become the norm to be an AH during wedding planning due to "stress", so people just seem to accept it. I can't think of a single other "stressful" life event where people can throw tantrums, abuse others, demand copious amounts of money, or dictate the actions/appearance of others and people would just give them a pass.

  26. NTA. i find it very weird she spoke to you specifically and not your dad. asking a child to change their clothes entirely is unreasonable. and then believing that a child wearing a cute dress can "ruin" an entire wedding and is still bitching about it months later is stupid.

  27. That’s just it though. The bride demanded it out of her because she thought since she’s younger I can bully her into changing. Had she tried with dad (or Mum) to make his daughter change it definitely wouldn’t go well

  28. That part wasn't weird to me, it's easier to manipulate a child to do what you want and especially without letting the adults know.

  29. She didn’t ask the parents first because she knew that was a losing battle. Bullies prey on the weak and a 17-year old teen is an easy mark for an adult. NTA OP and props to your parents for doing their parental duties.

  30. Man weddings in general lately. I recently went to one and it seems that everyone except the brides mom got the memo that you should probably not wear a wedding dress to a wedding thats not yours lmao. I'm sure she thought she could get away with it bc it was off white and not white but it was Definitely a wedding dress veil and all

  31. I got engaged a few months ago and the first thing my best friends told me was to pick a modest dress and color for them so I can stand out.

  32. Info: Do you have a picture of the dress or something similar in the same color? (I'm just nosy and love pretty dresses)

  33. lmaoo I'm going to send u a dress that's similar with the dress I wore since I'm uncomfy posting my body. Okay?

  34. NTA. The only color you can't wear is white. Bride is just jealous of you and shouldn't be dictating what makeup you should wear and what color to wear.

  35. I got talked to once because I wore a black dress and had bright pink hair (I cosplay and it's not my fault their wedding was the day before halloween) like I'm sorry I didn't realize the dress code was Levi's and flannels. I stayed out of pictures and what not and I figured a black dress was my best option, maybe I just shouldn't have gone 😅

  36. I've always heard (possibly outdated standards) that women shouldn't wear a red dress either, for fear of it being too provocative. Sounds like the same BS about red cars getting more speeding tickets. But all the same, it's something I've heard multiple times throughout my life.

  37. our bridesmaids were all in green, guess we will have bad luck in our marriage 27 years ago. Guess I should inform my wife it is over

  38. Second post this week where the bride had rules about makeup. What the hell is going on with these brides?

  39. I can’t help but wonder what the hell else is going on here? Did you sleep with the groom? Was the sage dress see through? Or just nipple tassels and a short skirt? Did any other guests get pulled into the dragons lair and told to change?

  40. The bride is now harassing OP. What kind of pathetic, gross-ass person harasses a 17 year old over something so small? And how insecure do you have to be that you feel like a 17 year old in a completely normal/appropriate outfit is upstaging you at your wedding? Pathetic.

  41. NTA but it's refreshing to see your parents sided with you..go dad!! Don't worry that bride was beyond insecure and will probably be single again within a year

  42. NTA...The bride obviously hasn't gotten over herself. You need to tell your parents that you're being bullied by a bridezilla.

  43. What is with these weddings where the bride demands that guests wear certain colors and makeup? This would have been considered completely rude in my day. NTA.

  44. Yeah I don’t understand it either. If your worrying about what other people are wearing on your wedding day then perhaps you are just to immature to be getting married. I couldn’t have cared less what people wore to my wedding and to be honest I can’t even remember what half the people were wearing. I do know that everyone had a great time and it was one of the best days of my life!! I was that unbothered that my 2 daughters who were flower girls had completely different dresses as they didn’t like the same one but they were both comfortable in what they wore.

  45. While I did pick a specific dress for my girls I straight up told them I wanted them to be comfortable and look good. Like if I look good and be comfortable, I want everyone around me to look good and comfortable.

  46. tbh I think it rly complimented my skin, so it was cute. My parents friend were complimenting them for "raising such a beautiful young girl". I think it was cute

  47. NTA. The bride sounds like she is dealing with some serious insecurities issues, and it isn’t fair that she is taking them out on you. Dressing well is a sign of respect to the bride and groom. This whole “don’t dress too flashy so you don’t outshine the bride” is ridiculous. People won’t outshine the bride, and people who try will be recognized and seen as such.

  48. What is with all of these posts? I understand not wanting to be “outshined” on your wedding day, but these all feel more like MAJOR insecurity on the brides’ part. The attention is ALWAYS on the bride on the wedding day. Short of a guest wearing a white dress and stirring drama. She’s the one taking attention off herself and onto you by throwing a fit. No one would have noticed what you were wearing if she hadn’t gone all psycho on you. NTA

  49. Totally agree. Are there really people as insecure and petty as this bride? I’m guessing OP rode to the wedding with her parents and was kind of stuck—personally I’d have left and taken any gift I brought home with me! Pray for the new husband…he’s going to need it!

  50. NTA. Here’s a tip about weddings that you’ll figure out as you get older: a bride who dictates the makeup and clothing of her regular wedding guests is unreasonable and she will be a nightmare. Always.

  51. NTA, one thousand percent. If Bridezilla is so insecure that she feels the need to dictate what every other woman around her wears, maybe she’s not ready to get married.

  52. Well i have a question. Why should they have talked to your Dad and not you….Seems like this situation doesn’t involve in. But i agree with you. If she asked you to stand more off to the side or to the back during major parts of the wedding I’d kinda understand that. But at the end of the day sounds like the bride is insecure and needs to be confident and see that everyone is there for her and her husband. All eyes are on them and now the guests will be looking around to see who the bride got mad at. So kinda her own fault. But congratulations You’re NOT the Asshole

  53. yeah I thought it was strange that they haven't talked to my parents. I think it's bcs my mom and dad is older than them

  54. NTA, Sage green is too flashy?? I think you just cracked the codeword for too pretty aka "too flashy." And they were not happy about it.

  55. NTA. Her insecurity would have caused her to flip out over something. It could not have been prevented. Unfortunately it was you.

  56. NTA she ruined her own wedding by being insecure and childish. She's the bride, there's no stealing the spotlight from her.

  57. NTA, the bride and her parents have serious issues. The idea that a 17-yr.-old guest's dress "ruined" a wedding and "destroyed" the bride's big day sounds overly dramatic and pitiful. Unless the dress was showy or gaudy, it sounds like the bride is just envious of OP. Let this roll off your back, OP, and block those people. Kudos to your parents.

  58. It's so sad to see so many posts on this topic. It never crossed my mind that wedding "demands" would go so far off the rails. Yes, it's the brides day, along with the groom. It's a day of celebration and joy that's gone the way of dictatorship. Don't wear this hairstyle, makeup, clothing, or the bride will lose her mind. I understand some uniformity asks but this has gotten way out of control. It's rude, insecure and entitled. Full stop.

  59. NTA - Bridezilla is jealous and hates to think that anyone might be prettier than her. She kicked you out of the wedding and made you feel bad about yourself. Let the parents work it out and go and be a kid. You can deal with this adult crap later in life.

  60. NTA - said something similar on another post. The bride should have been thinking happy thoughts about love, rainbows, and honeymoon nights rather than what one of the guests was wearing. Next all of the guests at weddings will be asked to wear paper bags with blinders (or maybe burlap) on their heads cause how dare anyone look anywhere but adoringly at the bride.

  61. Major NTA. I will not understand brides like this. My wedding dress code is “please try to upstage me because you absolutely won’t and I want everyone to look and feel amazing.” Like it’s not possible to upstage a bride and groom. If they’re happy, that’s going to outshine any guest, flashy dress or otherwise. And why wouldn’t you want your wedding to be filled with gorgeous, well-dressed people having the time of their lives?!

  62. nta but honestly it could be worse you could be married to her i dont think it would have mattered what you wore she would have had an issue with it regardless

  63. NTA, This had nothing to do with the color. This woman is obviously very insecure and she's projecting her issues onto you. Imagine being so jealous of someone dressed in a soft, muted color and transparent lip gloss. It's not like you had drag makeup and were dressed like a disco ball!

  64. NTA- what’s with all these insecure brides telling people what to wear and how to do their makeup. It’s rude, uncouth and mannerless. If you invite someone to celebrate with you as long as they aren’t wearing white, go with it. These brides ruin their own day by fixating on the guests (and staff) appearance rather than on the celebration.

  65. I thought the only color you're not supposed to wear is white. Also if it was "just a dress", then why was she throwing a hissy fit over it and harassing you days after her wedding? NTA and I'm glad your parents backed you up.

  66. So I see where you've commented that the bridal party/bridesmaids were in purple so INFO: what were the other colors of dress guests were wearing?

  67. there were girls wearing dark green, lavander, deep blue. It was dark colours or pastel, nothing too flashy.

  68. I remember seeing other girls taking off their makeup at the bathroom. I'm not sure if it's related, if I have a chance I will be asking them

  69. NTA - and I hope I get invited to a wedding with all these stupid rules one day, I'm gonna figure out a way to break every. single. rule. cause the term bridezilla is become to common.

  70. NTA. And this trend of brides controlling every aspect of their guests' wardrobe choices beyond noting basic expectations on the invite (cocktail, formal, black tie, etc) is really... something. And then winding up in tears about it? Spare me.

  71. INFO: What was the fit / cut of the dress? Was it form fitting? Was it short? Was it long with a deep slip? Did it have a deep neckline or anything?

  72. It was actually longer than what I expected. There was a slit in the middle of the bottom to help me walk. The neckline wasn't really deep, and even if there was it wouldn't be a problem since I got no tiddies. Only the waist part was more fitting, but it's still a little bit loose so I can eat a lot.

  73. Nta. Let me guess the black dress was hers and she disliked that your petite frame was showing her up. You probably wouldn't have been on the radar unless a groomsman or groom hadn't said how nice you looked triggering the "it's about me" rage

  74. NTA. If the bride is so demanding of what people wear that she's willing to kick them out she should be more specific about the dress code on her invites.

  75. NTA. wtf is wrong with these bridezillas? OP is only 17! if they don't want anyone to steal their spotlight then why don't they wear a golden cape and ride a unicorn!!

  76. Take off your make up 😝 what in the serious fuck kind of demand is that. So she doesn’t want anyone to look good at her wedding because they will outshine her? Pathetic

  77. NTA. Aaaahhhhh, modest, discrete, low key, the most subjective instructions ever. You are a minor, you modest might not be another's, brides and families should be required to go to therapy, before a wedding.

  78. NTA. i'm pretty sure that the bride can't survive in a desi wedding for sure 'cause in our side, if we don't go all out for the wedding then that means we're not celebrating it properly or not happy enough...

  79. Next up: Am I the Asshole for ruining my own wedding because some high schooler followed my clothing guidelines and it STILL didn’t protect me from being insecure?

  80. Sounds like the bride is ugly on the inside and doesn't want anyone to have the possibility of looking remotely more attractive than her on 'her big day'. Also what the hell is wrong with her for accosting a bloody teenager about it!

  81. Are those messages from the bride? She's really saying that stuff to a kid (I don't mean to call you a kid OP, but an adult saying that to a 17-year-old girl is unacceptable)? Jesus, she's really insecure. It's a lovely dress and not at all showy. I think when she said modest she really expected everyone to show up in oversized long sleeved potato sacks.

  82. NTA - The only slightly questionable aspect would be the type of fabric, satin is flashy, so might not have been the best choice if this was a daytime wedding. However, the bride (and/or her mother, since how did the bride see you before the ceremony started?) getting fixated on a teenager's wardrobe choices was choosing to take out their wedding stress on you. The bully "ruined" her own wedding by focusing on something irrelevant.

  83. I can't really explain the estructure of the place, but it was huge. There's a balcony with black windows, so the bride can see us.

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