AITA for making a comment about how my husbands aunt still lives with her mother?

  1. So 'embarrassing her over something she has no control over' living at her mothers' house? She does have control over that. She just chooses to be a leech. She has a job, save the money and move out!

  2. NTA - "Embarrassing her over something she has no control over" is exactly what she did to Sam. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

  3. NTA. That wasn’t even an insult compared to what she lobbed at you. If she doesn’t want to be judged, she shouldn’t go passing judgment on other people. (And if she’s really that unhappy with her current circumstances, I don’t buy that there are no alternatives available to her; she just apparently likes those even less, so she needs to make her peace with having chosen this one.)

  4. NTA. She doesn’t want to be embarrassed in public over something she has no control of? She could get a job and move out. Your SIL, on the other hand, has absolutely 0 control over her situation. Why does she deserve to be humiliated like that? Susan needs a reality check. Probably more than one.

  5. Your apology is right there in your last sentence. "I'm so sorry. I sincerely regret inviting you to our hideous house. Be assured it won't happen again."

  6. NTA and good on you for standing up to Susan. She wants an apology but if i were you I'd tell her don't start no shit, won't be no shit.

  7. NTA. Really. You were sticking up for your sister-in-law who you are close with. Your comment was petty. Her comment was just atrocious. Eff Susan and the horse she rode in on.

  8. “Humiliating her for something she has no control over” The absolute nerve of her! Like SIL can control her infertility? NTA

  9. NTA Kicking her out for her comments about Sil was the right thing to do. Then she said, 'you bought a hideous house; and you said, 'well I think your mother's house is very nice, lucky you.' You are allowed to match energy for energy, especially when being insulted in your own home, but you actually didn't say anything negative at all, she just took it that way!

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  11. You are definitely NTA but she is as well as being a bully. She insulted your SIL, insulted you and your husband and your house. Do not apologize. Do not let her back into your house. Toxic people should be banned.

  12. She was being a rude, hateful person, and you gave her a taste of what she did to others. NTA, and considering your SIL was left in tears. Her family should prioritize you and your SIL, not a miserable person leeching on social activities for gossip.

  13. Aunt Susan can go eat dirt. HER child doesn't even live with her, so maybe speculating about someone else's parenting skills isn't the best use of her time.

  14. NTA tell her you will apologize when she apologizes to your sil. And explain the difference in not being able to control something for instance sil can’t control fertility issues the aunt on the other hand can control living with mommy by getting a job.

  15. NTA - "some people said I was a bit harsh since Susan is embarrassed to live with her mother"?! I'm sorry, but after what she said about SIL there is no moral high-ground she can crawl to that would have made you the AH. She got exactly what she deserved and I wouldn't budge on the apology either.

  16. NTA She's your typical bitter unsuccessful person who attacks others to make her feel better about herself. Don't ever allow her in your home,again. She'll either say something disrespectful or actually damage something.

  17. NTA. She made a horrible and unfair comment about your SIL and it seems extremely unlikely that she didn't mean to be overheard. Who has a nasty phone conversation about a family member in a public room at a family gathering?! It's no accident that your SIL was nearby.

  18. NTA - humiliating her over something she can’t control….like fertility??? I’m pretty sure she has more control over her living situation than SIL has over her ability to get pregnant. Good on you for standing up to her!

  19. NTA in fact instead of apologizing i think you should double down and embarrass her harder. what she said was unacceptable and out of line. don’t dish it if you can’t take it

  20. NTA. What is it she has no control over? Her mouth? I guess I could say something like "I'm sorry you aren't able to control your big yap long enough to prevent saying hurtful things. I, unfortunately, can't control my need to kick assholes out of my house."

  21. NTA. You could have been more hurtful saying she shouldn't judge how good of a parent others might be when your own kid won't see you. She played stupid games and won stupid prizes. just don't include her anymore.

  22. NTA. She absolutely has control over her mouth. If she didn’t want to be embarrassed or humiliated, she shouldn’t have been talking shit about your SIL AT ALL, let alone within earshot of her! And if she didn’t want her living situation called out, she shouldn’t have insulted you and your house. On top of that, she’s a grown ass adult with a job, so how is her living situation out of her control? If her job doesn’t pay enough, she could get a different job or a second job. Her child is an adult and doesn’t live with her, doesn’t sound like she has to support her mother financially, so unless her mom needs a caregiver, she can absolutely take control. Maybe don’t invite her anymore.

  23. Since it’s such an “ugly house” she shouldn’t have to worry about every coming back because you should never allow her to go to any functions you host. You are NTA. I’m so proud you stood up to her as what she said is really out of line for SIL. Also, I’m sure your house is wonderful!

  24. What exactly doesn't she have control over? Because the only thing I can see her not having control over is her big mouth and her bitter jealousy. you are NTA

  25. Susan had complete control over her mouth. She just needed to keep those lips closed. Seens like she thinks you threw her out because her mother's house is disgusting and not because of her idiotic comments.

  26. my husband insisted that I invite her despite my concerns. He says that she would make a big deal if everyone was invited but her. I honestly wished I didn’t.

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