Religion, all fad diets/diet culture, about 95% of the "alternative health" industry, that money doesn't buy happiness... it definitely does, that the world is in any way fair or just, that literally anyone is watching you or cares what you're wearing/look like, that compromising yourself or your integrity will lead to friendship/love, that you can't job hop or change careers 20 times, that love is enough to make a bad relationship work, that you can love someone into mental health/sobriety/adulthood/responsibility, that anyone is watching you in the change room, that anyone can't learn any skill, that you can make a relationship work if ONLY YOU'RE WILLING TO WORK HARD ENOUGH, that you can't always start over, that anyone is impressed by how much you can drink/do drugs, that anyone is impressed by ineptitude and particularly pride in ineptitude/laziness.
It would depend on your background, income level, location, etc.. Western concert music (what we colloquially refer to as "Classical music") would have been pretty predominant on a lot of radio broadcasts as far as music was concerned. Composers like Shostakovich, Stravinsky, Bartok, and Ravel were very active during this time.
If he expects you to fully take on a daily chore, then he must also FULLY take on a daily chore. If he wants to cook dinner every day in exchange, and you're cool with that, great! If he wants to do all the dishes and clean the kitchen every day, and you're cool with that, great!
Your sister's desire to capitulate to her ILs because she wants their money is, frankly, gross. Tell sis that unless ILs plan to buy you a house for the sacrifices they think they're entitled to, they can pound sand, and so can she.
As an introvert, this raises some red flags for me. People who are described as "playing pranks" and "joking around" are, 99 times out of 100, bullies. They say a mean thing and claim it was 'just a joke', or play a mean prank and then laugh at your expense, and then justify it by saying it was just a 'prank'. Pranks and jokes MUST be done by mutual consent, or it's just bullying. I know a ton of people who were 'joking' with me while they spent hours making fun of me and humiliating me. It's not funny, it's fucking awful, and it's just another kind of abuse.
Very this. I've heard every excuse, and it's always that: an excuse. Saying "I misjudged the time" is an excuse once. If you do it 2 or 3 times, then you know that you need to add more time. And you keep adding more time until you're there on time. Like, it's information a 1st grader can learn.
I was married to someone like this. Part of the reason he bought cheap shit was because he wasn't careful and broke it all the time, so didn't feel bad replacing a dish set that was $100 for 16 pieces. But he treated my stuff with the same lack of care and when I called him on it, he said it was my fault for having it in the house, and he would either not replace it, or replace it with something cheap and awful. I like your solution better.
"Why did you bother to ask me if I enjoyed myself if you'd only get angry when I told you the truth?! Next time when I'm required to lie to you, please let me know in advance what lies I'm required to say. If you want to know how I feel, I'll tell you, but my feelings don't change just because you don't like them."
Charging people for food at a wedding is the epitome of selfish, rude behaviour. ESPECIALLY if you don't tell them ahead of time so they can plan appropriately (or just not come). Your daughter made some garbage choices that generated a lot of ill will, and having the family be upset at her is a consequence of her bad decisions.
Part of rehab is being accountable for what you did when you were using. And being accountable means making amends and dealing with consequences. She's been using HER WHOLE LIFE, and expects a gold star and a pat on the head because she's been clean for what, a month?!
It wouldn't just be the $135, if the dogs go to the bathroom in the house, you could be sued for the entire replacement value of the floors if Airbnb insurance doesn't cover it, and would likely lose access to the platform permanently.
Your parents are failing all of you. They don't do anything about the abuse, and then expect you to be Liv's emotional support animal because they can't be arsed to parent their frankly absurd number of children.
He does not get to tell you what you can or can't do in your own horse with your own things. His obsession is not your problem to solve. Use your computer where you like, share your address where you want, and stop driving him around.
I hope so because I really don't want to be forced to attend their wedding or take part in anything else like this. I hate seeing him already but ugh seeing her and the play pretend stuff annoyed me.
I mean, the best way to ensure he stops forcing you to go to these events is to just say that you will continue to air his dirty laundry any time he tries to make you go to shit like this, or tries to lie about you, or lie on your behalf. If he says you have to go to the wedding, tell him that you will ensure everyone knows about his cheating, abandoning his dying wife, and fathering a child with a married woman who lied to her then husband about the kid's paternity. And he can threaten to punish you all he wants, but you will ensure everyone knows the truth if you are forced to attend.
I see 1 or 2 issues potentially happening here:
Religion, all fad diets/diet culture, about 95% of the "alternative health" industry, that money doesn't buy happiness... it definitely does, that the world is in any way fair or just, that literally anyone is watching you or cares what you're wearing/look like, that compromising yourself or your integrity will lead to friendship/love, that you can't job hop or change careers 20 times, that love is enough to make a bad relationship work, that you can love someone into mental health/sobriety/adulthood/responsibility, that anyone is watching you in the change room, that anyone can't learn any skill, that you can make a relationship work if ONLY YOU'RE WILLING TO WORK HARD ENOUGH, that you can't always start over, that anyone is impressed by how much you can drink/do drugs, that anyone is impressed by ineptitude and particularly pride in ineptitude/laziness.
Basic marriage rule: You ALWAYS run interference for your own side of the family. If not, you deal with ALL THE CONSEQUENCES of that.
It would depend on your background, income level, location, etc.. Western concert music (what we colloquially refer to as "Classical music") would have been pretty predominant on a lot of radio broadcasts as far as music was concerned. Composers like Shostakovich, Stravinsky, Bartok, and Ravel were very active during this time.
If he expects you to fully take on a daily chore, then he must also FULLY take on a daily chore. If he wants to cook dinner every day in exchange, and you're cool with that, great! If he wants to do all the dishes and clean the kitchen every day, and you're cool with that, great!
Tell her that you're providing the exact same help to her that she provided to you.
A barbie pool filled with tartar sauce.
Your sister's desire to capitulate to her ILs because she wants their money is, frankly, gross. Tell sis that unless ILs plan to buy you a house for the sacrifices they think they're entitled to, they can pound sand, and so can she.
As an introvert, this raises some red flags for me. People who are described as "playing pranks" and "joking around" are, 99 times out of 100, bullies. They say a mean thing and claim it was 'just a joke', or play a mean prank and then laugh at your expense, and then justify it by saying it was just a 'prank'. Pranks and jokes MUST be done by mutual consent, or it's just bullying. I know a ton of people who were 'joking' with me while they spent hours making fun of me and humiliating me. It's not funny, it's fucking awful, and it's just another kind of abuse.
I over estimate my speed and underestimate traffic
....so why not change that?
Because they don't actually care to be on time.
Very this. I've heard every excuse, and it's always that: an excuse. Saying "I misjudged the time" is an excuse once. If you do it 2 or 3 times, then you know that you need to add more time. And you keep adding more time until you're there on time. Like, it's information a 1st grader can learn.
I was married to someone like this. Part of the reason he bought cheap shit was because he wasn't careful and broke it all the time, so didn't feel bad replacing a dish set that was $100 for 16 pieces. But he treated my stuff with the same lack of care and when I called him on it, he said it was my fault for having it in the house, and he would either not replace it, or replace it with something cheap and awful. I like your solution better.
[удалено]
Into the 1900s.
"Why did you bother to ask me if I enjoyed myself if you'd only get angry when I told you the truth?! Next time when I'm required to lie to you, please let me know in advance what lies I'm required to say. If you want to know how I feel, I'll tell you, but my feelings don't change just because you don't like them."
Charging people for food at a wedding is the epitome of selfish, rude behaviour. ESPECIALLY if you don't tell them ahead of time so they can plan appropriately (or just not come). Your daughter made some garbage choices that generated a lot of ill will, and having the family be upset at her is a consequence of her bad decisions.
Part of rehab is being accountable for what you did when you were using. And being accountable means making amends and dealing with consequences. She's been using HER WHOLE LIFE, and expects a gold star and a pat on the head because she's been clean for what, a month?!
It wouldn't just be the $135, if the dogs go to the bathroom in the house, you could be sued for the entire replacement value of the floors if Airbnb insurance doesn't cover it, and would likely lose access to the platform permanently.
Your parents are failing all of you. They don't do anything about the abuse, and then expect you to be Liv's emotional support animal because they can't be arsed to parent their frankly absurd number of children.
He does not get to tell you what you can or can't do in your own horse with your own things. His obsession is not your problem to solve. Use your computer where you like, share your address where you want, and stop driving him around.
NTA
God, no. Please make then stop. Please stop inviting me, please stop with the gift grabs and the aggressive and inappropriate gendering of EVERYTHING.
There's an aria in The Birds by Braunfels that's sung by Prometheus.
I hope so because I really don't want to be forced to attend their wedding or take part in anything else like this. I hate seeing him already but ugh seeing her and the play pretend stuff annoyed me.
I mean, the best way to ensure he stops forcing you to go to these events is to just say that you will continue to air his dirty laundry any time he tries to make you go to shit like this, or tries to lie about you, or lie on your behalf. If he says you have to go to the wedding, tell him that you will ensure everyone knows about his cheating, abandoning his dying wife, and fathering a child with a married woman who lied to her then husband about the kid's paternity. And he can threaten to punish you all he wants, but you will ensure everyone knows the truth if you are forced to attend.