You_are_a_dolt










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Laugh like a supervillain

















  1. Mine are: Karate Kid “Put him in a body bag!” It’s “Get him a body bag!”

  2. GET HIM A BODY BAG!!! Yeeaaaahhhh

  3. I’d like to thank you for getting the quote right. Do you know how hard I chew my tongue when I hear “Put him in a body bag!”

  4. Full disclosure: I always thought it was “put”, but I quickly Googled it before I posted my reply and learned I’d been wrong my whole life. #growth

  5. Thank goodness I didn't find out about this until I was already a desensitized adult. If I had found out what an asshole he actually was in my childhood, it would've broke my little heart.

  6. I think a lot of 90s kids felt the shock. “Be like Mike” was real back then. Loved for his basketball dominance, but that’s about it.

  7. I feel like Michael Jordan is the reason behind the “don’t meet your childhood idols, because you’ll be disappointed” saying

  8. He may not be the reason, but he’s damned sure a reinforcement to the rule.

  9. The details are the other way around though. A woman abused him and his father/family did nothing about it. Davis has said explicitly in interviews that “Daddy” is not about his father abusing him. It is an agonizing song ending either way.

  10. Practice. Amy Cuddy has a terrific Ted Talk on how your body posture can actually trick your brain into being more confident. That shit worked for me. Fake it till you become it.

  11. Our girls softball coach was and still is married to a former student, who was on the softball team.

  12. Eat non regional food. If you’re not in the southwest, don’t bother with Mexican food. If you’re not in the northeast, no seafood. If you’re not in the South, don’t bother with barbecue. There are exceptions everywhere, but wherever you’re going, they have a specialty and I urge you to have as much of it as possible.

  13. YES 🤓 and accidentally delete their email 🤐

  14. Did you find that Diamond members were usually the nicest and new Silver members were the fucking worst?

  15. 100%!!! And blues thinking they never got their “amenities” they deserved lol

  16. “I just signed up for rewards, where’s my free shit?”

  17. Every math teacher ever: “What, you think you’re always going to have a calculator in your pocket?” We showed them!!!

  18. The fact that people are so free in America they bitch and whine without fear, never realizing how great it is here.

  19. I’ll never remember where I heard this but it went something like: A true measure of a nation’s greatness is to look at how many people are trying to get in vs how many are trying to get out.

  20. Lots of people would love to leave the US, but it isn't easy. Getting citizenship for another country a major pain in the ass even if you're well off, and it can be straight up impossible for the most disadvantaged people who want to leave the most: the poor and the disabled.

  21. “Lots” is arguable, but it’s a drop in the bucket compared to how many are trying to get in.

  22. Yes! haha I love that as well. There’s nothing quite like an epic az monsoon

  23. Unless it’s 110 and windy. Then it just feels like you’re walking in an oven.

  24. My first child was born this morning

  25. I wish more women would learn and carry them (responsibly) more often. A 6’3” 250 lb man is still no match for a 9mm hollow to the chest.

  26. On a long enough timeline, all religions becomes the same thing: mythology.

  27. Absolutely agree. Careers stats are pretty bad. Nearly 50 more picks than TDs.

  28. There are a handful of QBs who won a lot, including super bowls, but don't really have the best stats

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Author: admin