Is this mold?

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  1. What is ppa? And how is it caused by the constant feeling of someone causing you harm?

  2. Post-partum anxiety. Fear of harm is part of hypervigilance/overactive nervous system that can be triggered after having a baby. When this worry becomes chronic and interrupts your quality of life, it needs to be addressed by medical and mental health professionals. PPA is common in up to 10% of the population and can present with PPD or independently

  3. My bun really loves music, really prefers EDM and dislikes hip hop

  4. Thank you for sharing. It feels so absolutely lonely parenting kids with autism and to hear from other family members is nice.

  5. I have an emotionally reactive, impulsive, intense Autistic daughter as well. She a bit younger (I fear the teens) but I have similar challenges. We Plan B a lot of stuff and I try to make home a low-demand environment so she can regulate and unmask. It's NOT always easy. I single-parent her half time and I have my guard up a lot.

  6. Oh! Yes, find something that helps her regulate, even if it's screens, and give her time to do it.

  7. Get an endocrinologist consult

  8. Yeah. This needs to be addressed by a specialitist who can run and analyze a metabolic panel.

  9. Do all bunnies need expressed glands? This is the first time I'm hearing about it! I am not a bun owner, just lurking and enjoying the bunz 😅

  10. No, not all buns need their scent glands cleaned. Most keep them fairly clean. But there are always some who need extra help!

  11. How do you know if yours needs extra help?

  12. Adults don't "take care of themselves." They take care of each other. That's family. That's community. That's interdependence. That's childrearing. YTA.

  13. Your wife may appreciate reading Body Full of Stars. It's a memoir of portpartum depression and rage and I know it made me feel much less alone and validated my confusing and isolating experience. This and a therapist specializing in ppd/ppa could be helpful for both of you

  14. Yes, looking back I believe I had undiagnosed post partem anxiety and anger was a big part of it. I couldn't understand why no one around me seemed to be feeling the same way I did, that everything was horrible.

  15. I was SO ANGRY. The rage and helplessness at my loss of control over my autonomy, schedule, wellbeing all hit me so hard an were so unexpected. Hormones and sleeplessness and colic and anxiety and a partner who seemed eden less confident than I felt all made it worse.

  16. Firefighting. Either it's an auto accident with glass everywhere, a medical call with blood and foeces, or a fire, and you're screwed regardless.

  17. I have a calendar for quarterly/seasonal chores that need to be done once yearly. For weekly chores, they each get assigned a day in rotation. Wednesday I clean the bathrooms. Thursday I vacuum the main floor. Sometimes I break them up into zones during the day. But then I don’t have to think about them the rest of the week.

  18. I let my ahhsome sit for a while and rinsed it right after draining— the resulting biofilm did require a little elbow grease but a Magic Eraser made it pretty easy to remove

  19. Uhhhh, neither? Bed by 1, up by 8:30? Trouble sleeping regardless? Can’t wake up regardless? 😂

  20. Bone-deep exhaustion. Being overstimulated or understimulated at the wrong times. Worry.

  21. To me, it sounds like your child’s teacher is very fond of her and trying to praise her as much as possible WHILE alerting you to signs of potential ADHD. This is under-diagnosed in girls. (Possibly because parents tend to equate the diagnosis with behavioral issues.) Do as she says and bring it up with the pediatrician. If she doesn’t have it, no need to dwell on it. If she does have it, you’d be doing her a major disservice to ignore the teacher’s advice just because she was pulling off a strong academic performance. A diagnosis doesn’t mean that you have to medicate her, but it can lead to helpful classroom interventions for her.

  22. Agreed. This was (and is) me. I did great in school but had to doodle constantly to have the right stimulation level to focus. My ADHD diagnosis came at 38 after my daughter was diagnosed. I never struggled until AFTER college, which I graduated with a 4.0. It was office life and juggling work with household management and parenting that got me. I do wish I had known as a kid. It would have helped me understand more about myself, not just the doodling and fidgets, but my big emotions and low internal regulation, my constant inner monologue, my anxiety and perfectionism, and my rejection sensitivity that made me more of a people-pleaser with poor boundaries. ADHD is a lot of things and there is help and understanding in a diagnosis with or without medication. That being said, meds are and were a game-changer for both me and my kid and I wish I hadn’t had the stigma against them that I did.

  23. I knew about bronies and I still went as Nightmare Moon when my four-year-old wanted to be Princess Celestia for Halloween one year. It’s cool. You good. It’s ok to still enjoy things that have weird fandoms.

  24. I don’t know, I don’t think it’s that rare, but maybe that’s just because I am one. 😅

  25. You don’t always have to feel positive emotions toward your child. It’s ok not to like them or feel love toward them all the time, especially when you are burned out and the relationship is not filling your bucket. If this is more than a temporary, passing experience that’s remedied by a short break, some you time, some support, rest, or respite, it’s definitely worth investing in therapy to work through and process these difficult feelings before they start impacting your relationship in tangible ways. (And yeah, it’s also hard to “fake it til you make it” all the time. Plus, kids can tell.)

  26. talk to her calmly and rationally; simply tell her that she's not acting responsibly and is demonstrating she's unable to handle using a device so it's gone effective immediately. If she wants it back, she has to demonstrate that she's mature enough to handle it and then talk about accountability, responsibly and trust and right now, she's not showing you any of that so as her parent, you are stepping in. Also give her examples of how she can rebuild trust and how she can show that she's responsible and trustworthy.

  27. I think this sort of response is important because it outlines both the consequences of her current actions AND gives her examples for how to rectify the situation. In the absence of feeling they have a way to succeed, it seems like a lot of kids will double-down on bad behavior or deflecting responsibility, possibly out of guilt or shame.

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