1. Talk to your doc. IBS isn't associated with thiss -- this would be a comorbidity.

  2. I was afraid of that but makes sense, thank you!

  3. In my experience, it’s all about how you talk to yourself. When you make a mistake and are hard on yourself, ask yourself if you would say the same things to your best friend, your mom, anyone you respect. (Hopefully) you recognize that you wouldn’t use the same language or tone with someone you respect, so it’s a good way to check yourself in the moment if you’re doubting yourself.

  4. Yesterday marked 1 year of controlling my alcohol intake and re-imagining my relationship with alcohol. Thinking back to all the guilt, shame, stress, and depression that I was shrouded in vs. the amount of energy and love I feel now is so crazy different. I love my life and where I am today, and I’m so proud of myself, even if I’ll be celebrating it alone. IWNDWYT!

  5. I'll celebrate with you today!🥳🧚‍♀️💃🎉🥳 And I'm super proud of you too!!! I'll even have a piece of cake in your honor!❤

  6. Have a sleep study done too. Brain fog could indicate a problem in that area. They can be done at home now. Very simple to do.

  7. I do have pretty bad fatigue so I’ll definitely consider that, thank you!

  8. You would need to see a rheumatologist for fibromyalgia diagnosis. So if a referral is required, see your PCP to request that, and if you don’t need a referral just make an appointment with a rheumatologist. They will diagnose and manage fibro if you have it, they could also refer you to a pain management doctor. If you don’t have it, rheumatologists also diagnose and manage other autoimmune disorders so they can do a more comprehensive work up specific to that area if they deem it necessary.

  9. Your in-laws are so incredibly sweet and kind - don’t feel guilty accepting their kindness, you truly deserve it. I’m so happy you were kept safe that night, don’t beat yourself up! You’re stronger than you think! 💜

  10. Very similar situation here - my SO and I drank daily together as a routine, it’s honestly how we bonded. I quit a few months back and I would buy him alcohol (when I felt comfortable doing so) and myself NA beer as a way to continue to bond/keep up with the routine. It worked for a while but I realized I didn’t need a bottle in my hand to bond with my SO, I just had to find new ways to bond. He can drink, I can talk and laugh along with him. I guess for me it just took time adjusting to my new habits, it doesn’t matter what he does as long as I’m safe and protecting myself. If his drinking triggers me or I get a craving, I find something else to distract my mind (CBD/THC, puzzles, video games), anything that “quenches” that thirst. I still drink only one drink on very rare occasions, but I had to tell myself that I don’t need alcohol to have fun and spend time with my partner - I just need myself to be healthy and happy. :)

  11. I love being able to remember what I’ve done and said for the past couple of months, so much more clarity and it feels great! IWNDWYT!

  12. Hey, Molten, I’m so proud of you for not drinking. You have a lot going on and you are still staying sober. I’m a teacher and if one of my students came to me and shared they were suffering with a multi day migraine I would definitely give them some grace. No matter what? I’m here for you, so you aren’t alone. I find taking a hot bath and some warm tea can help me when I’m feeling the way you described. And I’m giving you a big internet (((((hug)))))). IWNDWYT ❤️💜❤️💜

  13. Thank you for this response, you have no idea how much you’ve helped me. I’m definitely due for a nice, relaxing bath. Thank you thank you thank you. 💛💛💛

  14. I do not have experience with this but give it time! It may take a really long time but if people feel hurt by you it can take time for them to heal/get passed it. It will get better and they probably just need time to see that you have gotten better and are working on yourself. Your SO giving them updates on how you are doing may help as well. Stay strong, I can’t imagine how hard it is to feel the way you are right now.

  15. Thank you so much for this. It’s definitely a struggle but I’m hoping it’ll just take some more time. Good idea with having my SO give updates, I’m not sure how much he’s talked about me around them but I’ll see if it might help!

  16. I just want to say that I commend you for your 58 days. I remember my wedding day where I had to invite my alcoholic future father-in-law. I say HAD to invite, because he would have shown up anyway and caused a huge scene. That strain, that worry, really detracted from my/our special day. So I understand their rationale. But that doesn’t mean this will be a permanent situation. Perhaps after thanksgiving you could get together with them at a restaurant for dessert or something like that. It’s neutral territory, they can leave whenever they want to. Maybe don’t talk about being AF, let them see it. I was always so very stressed around this father-in-law, because he said he was going to quit but never did, and he put everyone through hell and eventually died from alcohol. No judgement on my part, considering I am on this Reddit. IWNDWYT

  17. Thank you so much for this perspective, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I completely understand that it is their special day and the fear of me having another episode makes their actions 100% understandable. I’m very open to letting them see it rather than having me tell them and ask for blind trust. Thank you again for this and congrats on 20 days! IWNDWYT :)

  18. I meditate daily. I can't seem to find peace anywhere else yet. But I'm working on it!✌🏻

  19. I used to meditate pretty regularly, I should definitely get back into it when I can get my mind to concentrate! Thank you for your response!

  20. I go out for a run, it burns off any excess energy I have and focuses my mind on something else.

  21. I’ve had a hard time getting into running but I’ve seen a lot of people who quit drinking getting into it, maybe there’s something there! Thank you for your reply!

  22. I’ve known about HALT for some time since I’ve been in therapy, I just never really implemented it like I was supposed to. I’d get angry or hungry or tired, acknowledge those emotions, and then drink anyways to “fix” it. Now that I’m almost two weeks sober, I’ve been super irritable and ready to blow up. Today, I got angry from work and school issues, and I just did a bunch of squats during a meeting instead of externalizing those emotions. Now I’m out of breath, I’ve gotten my aggression out, and I’m waiting for my green tea to cool down. IWNDWYT.

  23. Yes, and big time. Mood swings, irritability, sadness but also joy. I found that therapy, exercise and meditation helps surprisingly well.

  24. Thank you for your reply, definitely confirms all the weird mood swings! I’ll try to get back into exercising to work all of these emotions out!

  25. I exercised away my evening sadness for 2-3 weeks and it got so much better afterwards. That is until I relapsed. Here we go again now!

  26. I’ll see if I can get into a groove like that, wishing you the best and good luck on your journey!

  27. Changing my “why” from wanting to be better for others vs. wanting to be better for myself feels a lot more effective on this current streak of sobriety. I’m much more in tune with my emotions, what triggers me to drink, and how it was affecting my health instead of being concerned about what others are thinking. IWNDWYT!

  28. I’m 26, in grad school and live on my own. I feel so so similar to this, thank you for posting and sharing your story. I guess I’m functioning but I’m functioning nowhere near where I want to be and really believe I could be if I quit. Wishing you all the best

  29. I completely understand where you are, hope you’re hanging in there, wishing you the best too!

  30. So relatable. Alcohol turned me into someone I dont like, and dont want to be. Even knowing that, battling it as an addiction is really tough. I drank for too long, hurt people I care about, and couldnt stop. Thank you for sharing. Wishing you the best of luck!!! Well done on day 2!!💜💜

  31. Thank you so much for your reply and sharing your story, I feel a little more hopeful this time and I’ll keep checking in with this community as long as I have to!

  32. It was definitely tough but I made it through, thank you for the warning! IWNDWYT

  33. Good luck! Just the fact that you took so many steps in preparation shows that you’re serious. You are setting yourself up for success. You got this IWNDWYT

  34. Thank you so much for your well wishes, they really did help!! IWNDWYT

  35. I do have his exact written words where he says “I wanted to see if you admitted to it, you don’t have to pretend” which to me means that he wanted to catch me in a lie. If he’s uncomfortable with the relationship, he can say that without being passive aggressive. We’ve been super open about everything else in the past which is why this situation has thrown me for a loop, which means he probably does see S as a credible threat. Regardless, I have apologized and limited communication with S, and WP has apologized and admitted he should’ve gone about it differently.

  36. The problem is that I had completely disregarded S’s comment at the time and chalked it up to him just saying that I got crazy when I drank too much, which I already knew. That’s why I had no idea what WP was talking about, it just didn’t ring a bell for me. I agree though that we both do have work to do when it comes to effective communication when triggered. I hope that having a safer space to talk can come from all of this.

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