It's spring. It's a great time to learn a new position to make him more well rounded. Your son will gain a great perspective that will help him when he goes back to his natural position. My son is a defenseman and he always improved after he would play forward. Yes it was difficult and sometimes awkward but it helped him at his natural position.
NTA. You found a way to recoup the money even though your brother abdicated his responsibility. I am glad your nephew apologized. Also a Huge NTA for having and playing an Intellivision. I loved my friend's epic battles in Sea Battle!
NTA. By the way, you write your post, your sister is a perfect choice and would be the prototypical example other than what gender she was born. You stick to your guns and absolutely under no circumstances change anything. Glad to see your fiance back you up. Your fiance, however, has to ramp up the severity to his parents. Better to have the battle now than later, since your relationship with your sister/mom isn't going to change and will affect future milestones.
NTA. She stole from your incredibly sick to dying mom. You had and did everything correctly. Sometimes doing the correct thing only brings you shit. Tell all of the flying monkeys how they feel if their lived ones stole from them in the same condition your mother was in.
NTA. This is because you provided very reasonable compromises/options for your guests. I am not one who likes themed weddings, since I just wanted people to show up and have fun in my wedding years ago. I don't remember what people wore, I just remember that the venue, wedding consultants, and all the guests said it was a really fun and enjoyable wedding. The only dress code was for the wedding party. While I don't like themed weddings, I would have absolutely dressed to meet your dress code within the options you provided, they were very reasonable. Go have your wedding the way you want it and let your fiance handle your future MIL and SIL.
Slight YTA for now pending the answer to the following. Was all three drinking at the dinner? The reason I ask is that it is reasonable to be able to relieve stress when a loved one is in the hospital. The helps in the long run. The reason I picked up on this is that things in hospitals are unpredictable and can change on a dime. There are times when parents have to go back to the hospital and it's extremely important to have a plan in place for this. If there was no plan on your husbands and his parents then I'd say he was the AH. If there was a plan in place then you would have been the AH since you were taking out your stress on your husband.
Moved my son last year to tennis racket tape. He loves it. Maintains feel, can be re-wrapoed if needed and isn't expensive when compared to vynal wraps.
YTA. There seems to be some food snob tone in the post as I had read it. You made no mention of your cooking qualifications. Also, your list of what is wrong can be subjective. For example, take a steak, you didn't mention that it wasn't cooked to the minimum safe temperature. It could have been cooked correctly but you may have preferred is more towards medium well when it was medium rare (still cooked to a safe temp). You decided to be mean and seek attention and are trying to cover it by offering your help.
NTA. You did what you needed to do to support and advocate for your son. Your ex was wrong to invite the whole clan. They were not reading the situation and were only concerned about what "they" wanted not the betterment of your son. As someone else responded, they should have asked when it was okay for visitors.
Family dynamics is a minefield when growing up and can be more difficult when there is a step-parent involved. I understand both your and your step-mother's points. There is missing information so I am not going to give a judgement and that you are young. You are figuring things out as you grow and gain experience. What does come to mind is that you didn't write that your brother has attempted to contact you. He is the adult, yes he can say and rap things as adults do but there are consequences for those out in the real world.
NTA. The only AH are your mom (a major one) and her husband. You did everything right. You gave him it wasn't the time and place to have the conversation and tried to walk away. It was the husband who did this to himself and is the only one to blame for the interaction. Everyone who agrees or defends him needs to kick rocks.
YTA and big time. You are a budding thief. First, you hit on your sister's boyfriend at the time (Stealing attempt #1). You are now trying to steal the set-aside education money allotted to Emily (Stealing attempt #2). Your grades and work history are irrelevant. What is relevant is that both you and Emily are your mother's daughters. Also, it's your mom's money and she has the right to decide how to use it. You have absolutely no right to it. Keep up with this attitude and you will find yourself by yourself one day.
YTA and a massive one. A birthday is NOT the occasion to introduce someone of this importance. It only serves you and makes you happy. Your daughter had the correct reaction. It was you who set this situation up. You owe your daughter a massive apology. Go find a specialist on reunification to get the best knowledge of how to do this. Your son is a complete stranger and isn't family to your daughter yet and may never be the way you decided for the introduction to occur.
YTA. You're letting the wife and kids deal with someone in the blind. These things tend to end worse if you would enlighten the affected individuals. This isn't about being brothers, it's about being a decent human being. Yes it's hard and you are in a position that sucks. They are going to fight no matter if you spill the beans or not. This is big enough it is your place. If you want, talk with your brother that you know and give him a time frame to come clean. However, my preference would just tell the wife ASAP since your brother has already cheated once. He lost any consideration after the first time in my opinion. Do what makes sense to you but do something.
YTA. That was absolutely the wrong answer. It would have sufficed answering that your were going to try for both. With this said, I hate these questions since they do nothing but set you up for failure, which it did. Your brother is also an AH for asking this question. This is when you don't do black or white, you choose the grey answer.
Yes. My son's Code TMp Pro has been very durable. He is a 16U AA Defenseman. Have no problem keeping buying Sherwood sticks. Just to note, he uses the prostock sticks if there is any difference.
Who is the adult in your family? The answer looks like your niece. You were absolutely wrong about the public response and so was the rest of your family. I get people were shocked and surprised. Someone should have had the wear with to give a public answer in time, thus in private. This would have given you the best way to provide your answer.
ESH. You for the biological child comment. Your son is also the AH for the do-over-family comment. While I understand hurt played a role in both comments, they were both out of bounds. The fact is that your son is a grown-ass adult now. There isn't replacing those 24 years. Also, your comment would only be able to hurt and remind your son of what happened. You need to talk with your now adult children to remind them they will always be yours and there is no such thing as a do-over family, it's an addition to not a replacement for the family you have built with them.
NTA for the cheating part. Everybody has some type of history. It's there and you be better served recognizing it and getting comfortable with this fact. You were being insecure about the ex's and looking for proof. The stage was set here and you got the proof to justify your thoughts about ex's. Cheating is abhorrent as should never be tolerated. I'm guessing that your girlfriend thought that if there was no trust then I might as well do it then. She is still 100 percent the AH for cheating.
My son, a junior in High School, just received an invite from an ACHA coach. He was invited to tour the college and then a practice skate. I also see other local ACHA school advertise a practice skate to whom is interested. Look for these postings and contact your local school who has a ACHA program.
Go with the better coach. My son is going through this same thing this year. He moved up levels each year and is now AA. This year the players are better skilled than his past teams but has been an absolute shit show. We have an inexperienced coach. The prior two years he had a great coach but skill level wasn't as good or consistent throughout the team. He has learned so much more in the less skilled teams but with a better coach. It forces him to take up the slack and improve.
NTA. If not you, then who is going to stick up and support your sister? You got the go-ahead from your sister with her telling you you don't have to hold back. Also, it's your house and you have the right to refuse entry. Your house is going to be your sister's safe place as it appears. Keep supporting your sister in her fight for respect or look to be soon to be divorced.
NTA. To me, that was a perfect way to provide and teach independence. As you said, there were cousins there and you were only 15 feet away. You were plenty close enough to keep an eye on your daughter. I was riding my bike to other subdivisions at that age (been a long time and a different period). Your daughter should be proud and excited about the experience, that is one of the things that parents want. Her father went from 0 to nuclear way too fast and is wrong.
NTA. I am so very sorry that you and your siblings were treated the way you were. I am in the position your parents are in where I have supported a family member who has a chronic life-threatening condition. I raised this family member from the age of 3 into adulthood with a healthy sibling. While it is extremely hard at times, its the parent's responsibility to raise all of their kids. Yes there are frustrations but what your parents are doing is placing blame and playing the victim like you had any control. There are things that we had to do that affected my healthy child but always tried to make it up and do things that they deemed important, although it may have been delayed. I would drop everything without complaint and support the family member all over again.
YTA. Your fiancé is correct on this one. It really doesn't seem like you have made any compromises. Your fiance is also correct in that segregating is the antithesis of what a wedding should be, a union.
It's spring. It's a great time to learn a new position to make him more well rounded. Your son will gain a great perspective that will help him when he goes back to his natural position. My son is a defenseman and he always improved after he would play forward. Yes it was difficult and sometimes awkward but it helped him at his natural position.
NTA. You found a way to recoup the money even though your brother abdicated his responsibility. I am glad your nephew apologized. Also a Huge NTA for having and playing an Intellivision. I loved my friend's epic battles in Sea Battle!
NTA. By the way, you write your post, your sister is a perfect choice and would be the prototypical example other than what gender she was born. You stick to your guns and absolutely under no circumstances change anything. Glad to see your fiance back you up. Your fiance, however, has to ramp up the severity to his parents. Better to have the battle now than later, since your relationship with your sister/mom isn't going to change and will affect future milestones.
NTA. She stole from your incredibly sick to dying mom. You had and did everything correctly. Sometimes doing the correct thing only brings you shit. Tell all of the flying monkeys how they feel if their lived ones stole from them in the same condition your mother was in.
NTA. This is because you provided very reasonable compromises/options for your guests. I am not one who likes themed weddings, since I just wanted people to show up and have fun in my wedding years ago. I don't remember what people wore, I just remember that the venue, wedding consultants, and all the guests said it was a really fun and enjoyable wedding. The only dress code was for the wedding party. While I don't like themed weddings, I would have absolutely dressed to meet your dress code within the options you provided, they were very reasonable. Go have your wedding the way you want it and let your fiance handle your future MIL and SIL.
Slight YTA for now pending the answer to the following. Was all three drinking at the dinner? The reason I ask is that it is reasonable to be able to relieve stress when a loved one is in the hospital. The helps in the long run. The reason I picked up on this is that things in hospitals are unpredictable and can change on a dime. There are times when parents have to go back to the hospital and it's extremely important to have a plan in place for this. If there was no plan on your husbands and his parents then I'd say he was the AH. If there was a plan in place then you would have been the AH since you were taking out your stress on your husband.
Try Tennis racket grip tape. I moved to that stuff. It's great.
Moved my son last year to tennis racket tape. He loves it. Maintains feel, can be re-wrapoed if needed and isn't expensive when compared to vynal wraps.
YTA. There seems to be some food snob tone in the post as I had read it. You made no mention of your cooking qualifications. Also, your list of what is wrong can be subjective. For example, take a steak, you didn't mention that it wasn't cooked to the minimum safe temperature. It could have been cooked correctly but you may have preferred is more towards medium well when it was medium rare (still cooked to a safe temp). You decided to be mean and seek attention and are trying to cover it by offering your help.
NTA. You did what you needed to do to support and advocate for your son. Your ex was wrong to invite the whole clan. They were not reading the situation and were only concerned about what "they" wanted not the betterment of your son. As someone else responded, they should have asked when it was okay for visitors.
Family dynamics is a minefield when growing up and can be more difficult when there is a step-parent involved. I understand both your and your step-mother's points. There is missing information so I am not going to give a judgement and that you are young. You are figuring things out as you grow and gain experience. What does come to mind is that you didn't write that your brother has attempted to contact you. He is the adult, yes he can say and rap things as adults do but there are consequences for those out in the real world.
NTA. The only AH are your mom (a major one) and her husband. You did everything right. You gave him it wasn't the time and place to have the conversation and tried to walk away. It was the husband who did this to himself and is the only one to blame for the interaction. Everyone who agrees or defends him needs to kick rocks.
YTA and big time. You are a budding thief. First, you hit on your sister's boyfriend at the time (Stealing attempt #1). You are now trying to steal the set-aside education money allotted to Emily (Stealing attempt #2). Your grades and work history are irrelevant. What is relevant is that both you and Emily are your mother's daughters. Also, it's your mom's money and she has the right to decide how to use it. You have absolutely no right to it. Keep up with this attitude and you will find yourself by yourself one day.
YTA and a massive one. A birthday is NOT the occasion to introduce someone of this importance. It only serves you and makes you happy. Your daughter had the correct reaction. It was you who set this situation up. You owe your daughter a massive apology. Go find a specialist on reunification to get the best knowledge of how to do this. Your son is a complete stranger and isn't family to your daughter yet and may never be the way you decided for the introduction to occur.
YTA. You're letting the wife and kids deal with someone in the blind. These things tend to end worse if you would enlighten the affected individuals. This isn't about being brothers, it's about being a decent human being. Yes it's hard and you are in a position that sucks. They are going to fight no matter if you spill the beans or not. This is big enough it is your place. If you want, talk with your brother that you know and give him a time frame to come clean. However, my preference would just tell the wife ASAP since your brother has already cheated once. He lost any consideration after the first time in my opinion. Do what makes sense to you but do something.
YTA. That was absolutely the wrong answer. It would have sufficed answering that your were going to try for both. With this said, I hate these questions since they do nothing but set you up for failure, which it did. Your brother is also an AH for asking this question. This is when you don't do black or white, you choose the grey answer.
Yes. My son's Code TMp Pro has been very durable. He is a 16U AA Defenseman. Have no problem keeping buying Sherwood sticks. Just to note, he uses the prostock sticks if there is any difference.
Who is the adult in your family? The answer looks like your niece. You were absolutely wrong about the public response and so was the rest of your family. I get people were shocked and surprised. Someone should have had the wear with to give a public answer in time, thus in private. This would have given you the best way to provide your answer.
ESH. You for the biological child comment. Your son is also the AH for the do-over-family comment. While I understand hurt played a role in both comments, they were both out of bounds. The fact is that your son is a grown-ass adult now. There isn't replacing those 24 years. Also, your comment would only be able to hurt and remind your son of what happened. You need to talk with your now adult children to remind them they will always be yours and there is no such thing as a do-over family, it's an addition to not a replacement for the family you have built with them.
NTA for the cheating part. Everybody has some type of history. It's there and you be better served recognizing it and getting comfortable with this fact. You were being insecure about the ex's and looking for proof. The stage was set here and you got the proof to justify your thoughts about ex's. Cheating is abhorrent as should never be tolerated. I'm guessing that your girlfriend thought that if there was no trust then I might as well do it then. She is still 100 percent the AH for cheating.
My son, a junior in High School, just received an invite from an ACHA coach. He was invited to tour the college and then a practice skate. I also see other local ACHA school advertise a practice skate to whom is interested. Look for these postings and contact your local school who has a ACHA program.
Go with the better coach. My son is going through this same thing this year. He moved up levels each year and is now AA. This year the players are better skilled than his past teams but has been an absolute shit show. We have an inexperienced coach. The prior two years he had a great coach but skill level wasn't as good or consistent throughout the team. He has learned so much more in the less skilled teams but with a better coach. It forces him to take up the slack and improve.
NTA. If not you, then who is going to stick up and support your sister? You got the go-ahead from your sister with her telling you you don't have to hold back. Also, it's your house and you have the right to refuse entry. Your house is going to be your sister's safe place as it appears. Keep supporting your sister in her fight for respect or look to be soon to be divorced.
NTA. To me, that was a perfect way to provide and teach independence. As you said, there were cousins there and you were only 15 feet away. You were plenty close enough to keep an eye on your daughter. I was riding my bike to other subdivisions at that age (been a long time and a different period). Your daughter should be proud and excited about the experience, that is one of the things that parents want. Her father went from 0 to nuclear way too fast and is wrong.
NTA. I am so very sorry that you and your siblings were treated the way you were. I am in the position your parents are in where I have supported a family member who has a chronic life-threatening condition. I raised this family member from the age of 3 into adulthood with a healthy sibling. While it is extremely hard at times, its the parent's responsibility to raise all of their kids. Yes there are frustrations but what your parents are doing is placing blame and playing the victim like you had any control. There are things that we had to do that affected my healthy child but always tried to make it up and do things that they deemed important, although it may have been delayed. I would drop everything without complaint and support the family member all over again.